


A Lesson in love

by AliceInMarveland, JackTrades



Series: The Lesson Serie [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, 69 (Sex Position), Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Arguing, Avenger Bucky Barnes, Avengers Family, BAMF Bucky Barnes, BAMF Steve Rogers, BDSM, Blindfolds, Blow Jobs, Bottom Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes Feels, Deadpool being Deadpool, Dirty Talk, Dom Bucky Barnes, Dom/sub, Domestic, Domestic Avengers, Established Relationship, Handcuffs, Ice Play, Illustrated, M/M, Making Up, Marriage Proposal, Movies & tv shows references, NSFW Art, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Nipple Play, Nipple Torture, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Power Couple, Sex Toys, Smut, Steve Rogers Feels, Sub Steve Rogers, Subspace, Temperature Play, The universe being a troll to Bucky, Tigger Balm, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Top Bucky Barnes, Vibrators, well Bucky tries anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-18 17:47:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 28,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16521764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliceInMarveland/pseuds/AliceInMarveland, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackTrades/pseuds/JackTrades
Summary: “You haven’t noticed yet that if they still can argue like an old married couple, then everything’s fine?” Clint’s voice snorted in the mic.“Either you’re totally deaf or you’re totally stupid, Barton. They ALWAYS argue like an old couple!“Could you please stop talking about us like we aren’t here?” Steve huffed.“Leave it, Stevie, they’re just jealous ‘cause we make the better team,” Bucky pointed out casually.“What?!” Clint yelped in outrage, “Absolutely not! Nat and I school you.”“Keep thinking that, Birdman”“C’mon guys,” Sam sighed, “this is not the Badass Spouses contest!”As Bucky was overpowering the last robot, he stopped.Spouses?Bucky wants to propose, but the universe thought it'd be funny to troll him again. And again. And again.





	A Lesson in love

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the amazing JackTrades (aka Danielle Dastis) who did four gorgeous pieces of art and the banner in such short notice ! You totally rocked. And as always, a massive, full of love thanks to mohnjayer who beta-ed this monster of a fic and dealt with my anxiety during the whole process. You're a sweetheart ! You two made my 1st experience in BigBang a real delight.
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy !
> 
> PS: cookies to everyone who will find all the easter eggs/references !

 

It had started rather unexpectedly. They were in the middle of (yet another) battle, and not even a particularly original one. Some mad fucking scientist had made a stupid/dangerous fucking experiment, which had OF COURSE gone wrong, so he had been fired, which had made said mad fucking scientist even more mad and gave him the feeling he was a misunderstood genius yada yada, whatever.

And Steve could shove that disappointed glare up his ass, Bucky totally had the right to swear that much. Even if the attack was taking place in a primary school with petrified school children. Especially because the attack was taking place in a primary school with petrified school children!

“Fucking fuckity fuck,” Bucky groaned just as he managed to block a droid from hurting a little girl - pigtails, Finding Nemo backpack, terrified expression; the works. The kid squeaked and started to cry, paralysed with fear.  
“Why are there still kids here?” Bucky shouted, mostly to himself.

 As he was struggling with the damn metal _thing_ \- sometimes he really hated future - another robot barreled towards him to his right. He would have taken the blow if it hadn’t been for the shield of America’s very own symbol of justice and Bucky’s very own sweetheart.

“Some of them managed to hide themselves before we got here. Clint and Sam are looking for anyone left behind,” Steve said, picking up his weapon to better smash the robot and finish it. He reached his communicator, “Sam, we found another kid, come pick her up!” Then, as he decapitated another robot with the help of his shield, he added to Bucky, “And stop swearing like that!”

Bucky rolled his eyes, and knocked over the droid he was still fighting before smashing its face with his metal fist. The robot hissed and some wiring popped out of place before it lost the red light in its eyes and fell motionless to the concrete.

“Seriously, Rogers? You lecture me because of my swearing? Pot, meet kettle. You’re worse than I am!”

            “The difference is that I can control myself in front of children, Buck!”

“Yeah sure, Stevie. I’m sure their delicate ears are payin’ real good attention to what’s comin’ outta our mouths right now, when they’re too busy crying about -”

Bucky’s words were cut off when another robot (how many were they still?!) appeared from nowhere, floating in the air (they could do that now?!), with its eyes glowing a brighter red. Before he could blink, lasers shot down through them aimed right at him and Steve. Hoisting the Captain America shield Steve had lost between two punches, Bucky gathered his partner under his right arm, making Steve grunt out a faint “fuck” in surprise. He held him tight against his own body behind the shield, and sheltered them both with the vibranium defence. They automatically ducked their heads as the loud sizzle and red light reached them, making the air around them hotter for several long seconds.

As soon as the blast ended, Bucky squat down with the shield gripped tight in both hands facing upwards.

“I’m sorry, Stevie, what were you sayin’?”  Bucky asked sarcastically

“Okay, fuck, you win,” Steve grumbled and jumped on the flat surface. As soon as the super soldier’s feet touched the vibranium, Bucky used his strength to lift the shield and have Steve use it as a boost so he could punch the robot which had attacked them.

“Hey, sorry to interrupt you two geriatric lovers, but Nat and I finished clearing our area,” Tony’s voice resonated in their comms, “do you guys need a hand?”

“We’re good Tony, thanks. Focus on looking for children that may still be hiding,” Steve instructed, throwing his shield again to take a droid down. At the same time, Bucky shot another.

“You haven’t noticed yet that if they still can argue like an old married couple, then everything’s fine?” Clint’s voice snorted in the mic.

            “Either you’re totally deaf or you’re totally stupid, Barton. They ALWAYS argue like an old couple! Do you remember what happened in Rome or did we have a collective hallucination?! ”

Bucky saw Steve roll his eyes as they teamed up once more to neutralise the last remaining robots. “Could you please stop talking about us like we aren’t here?” Steve huffed.

“Leave it, Stevie, they’re just jealous ‘cause we make the better team,” Bucky pointed out casually.

“What?!” Clint yelped in outrage, “Absolutely not! Nat and I school you.”

            “Keep thinking that, Birdman,” Bucky smirked.

“C’mon guys,” Sam, with his voice of reason sighed, “this is not the Badass Spouses contest!”

As Bucky was overpowering the last robot, he stopped.

 

_Spouses?_

Could Steve and him be considered as husbands? Sure, they were lovers and never hid it in front of their friends. After a few months, they had even made it public through a press release. And if Bucky was honest with himself, he knew deep-down that he had always loved Steve, even back in Brooklyn when they were just two teens dealing with sexual awakening- when he had tried to ignore his feelings, before that first time they grinded against each other to release.

They did live together, had adopted a cat - well, technically Steve had Destiel before Bucky came back to ask his help but still. They fought sometimes because Steve was a reckless punk who didn’t care enough for himself, but they never stayed truly mad at each other for long. They still went on dates but most of the time they were happy to just laze around in their apartment at the Tower with some take-out. During these dinners, sometimes, they didn’t even speak but it was never uncomfortable silence. Just domestic.

Yeah, that’s it, that’s the word: they were pretty domestic. But it never felt routine, not in a bad way, more comforting than anything else. There was an intimacy between them, whether it was with simple, tender acts like a kiss on the forehead or shaving the other, or in their sex life, which was still amazing, if Bucky said so himself.

So. Official, domesticity, love, shared apartment, shared cat, couple habits without being boring, intimacy in all the levels, all of it having been there for a little while. But could they be considered as spouses?

Steve must have misunderstood his reaction for a pause to take his breath, as he informed the rest of the team through his mic, “We’re clear too!”

“Roger that, Rogers.”

Steve rolled his eyes, having grown used to Tony stupid jokes, and clasped his lover on the shoulder. “Well done, Buck,” he praised with a warm smile.

That jolted the sniper out of his reverie. “Huh? Oh, yeah. Not so bad yourself, babe,” he winked. Internally, he shook his head to clear it. Sam’s teasing had just taken Bucky by surprise. He shouldn’t overthink it.

 

Except he did.

 

As they made their way back to the Tower, the words hadn’t stop bugging him, echoing faintly in his brain in Sam’s cheerful tone. Bucky was sure Sam had said it as a joke, like he often did, which is why neither Steve, Clint, or Tony (or worse, Natasha) had not picked up on it. So why did he?

As they made their way to the common floor, they found the welcome party of Rhodey, Wanda, and Pepper. The first two had been on a mission of their own, which must have ended shortly before theirs. Pepper just seemed to be in the Tower at all hours doing whatever a CEO of a multi billion dollar company did on a daily basis.

“How evil, that time?” Rhodey inquired casually.

“Pretty low,” Clint answered, throwing himself on the couch. “Who attacks primary school, though? That’s a huge dick move.” Then glancing at Steve, “Sorry Cap.”

Steve huffed, rolling his eyes with a smile, “C’mon, really?”

Dum-E, Butterfingers, and U rolled in bringing a cacophony of happy chirps with them, rushing like children happy to have their parents back. Bucky didn’t really notice them coming before he was startled by something making strange sounds while petting his left arm.

“Oh, hey there buddy,” Dum-E - who had taken a liking to Bucky and more precisely to his metal arm - chirped happily at the acknowledgement. There was a shrill annoying beep that came from none of the robots, before Butterfingers rushed back to the common kitchen.

“They wanted to makes cookies for you. Aren’t they adorable?” Wanda asked, beaming.

“And we’re going to let Butterfingers carry them?” Steve asked, skeptically.

At that, Butterfingers scrambled in excitingly with a plate full of sweets in his clamp. Bucky could only watch as fate intervened to send the cookies crashing to the floor. Thankfully Steve was near and caught the plate with his superhuman reflexes - no one wanted to deal with three upset baby bots. “Smells wonderful! Thank you guys” Steve congratulated with a warm smile and a pat on Butterfingers head.

Steve was always so nice. So compassionate. Bucky’s heart swelled with love.

 

 _Spouses_.

 

“You okay, Buck?” his boyfriend asked, tilting his head and eyeing him carefully.

Bucky just shook his head, “Yeah, ’s nothing. Think I’m gonna hit the shower. Save some of these for me, though? I won’t take long and I really want to try our bots first baking attempt before Clint gets to it.” He didn’t even acknowledge said man’s noise of indignation.

He caught a glint of concern in Steve’s blue eyes, but the blond just pecked him on the lips.

“Sure.”

“Thanks, doll.”

If Bucky had to list all the things he loved in his new life, the pressure shower would be in the top ten. Maybe even top five, he mused while squeezing some “manly” smelling shampoo in his palm. Depended if all Steve-related things_ like being openly boyfriends or waking up to the blond’s snores_ were reunited in one big Steve label. He took a moment to wonder what smells constituted as “manly”. The only things Bucky could think of was BO and cum, and this shampoo smelt of neither, thankfully.

Bucky was never particularly gentle when washing his own hair. Lather, rub energetically, rinse. Two minutes tops. Steve, on the contrary, was always so caring when he was doing it for him. The first time Steve had offered - stealing the bottle the ex-Sergeant had just grabbed - Bucky had frowned, no doubt looking like a drenched Grumpy-Cat. He hadn’t understood nor seen any particular appeal to it. But then, Steve’s clever fingers had massaged his scalp and he had groaned in pleasure. He had understood then. Sure, they could be quick and practical, but they didn’t need to be. They were allowed to pamper each other. To take their time. To take care.

 

_To take as a husband._

That caused Bucky to snap out of his reverie so quickly he almost slipped. “Shit” he swore. He really didn’t need to give Tony license to laugh at him for the next fifty years if he was found with a broken leg and bare ass in the shower. JARVIS would thankfully probably alert Steve before his version of the serum healed him, though. He was too old for this shit.

When he exited the bathroom to his and Steve’s joint bedroom, he found Steve sitting on their bed. “Hey, you. Is everything okay?”

Steve shrugged, “I don’t know, Buck, you tell me. You seem a bit… off… since the mission. Is something bothering you?”

And there were the Famous Rogers Puppy Eyes. The deep pools of blue that said _“Pretty please? For me?”_ Bucky sighed and shook his head, impervious to that look after so many years of dealing with Steve’s shit.

“Nothing to worry about, Stevie. Just a bit tired, ‘s all.” Bucky could see that Steve wasn’t convinced. “We haven’t had a vacation since Thanos. Hey, c’mere babydoll.” He gently cradled the blond’s neck while sitting astride his thighs. Steve’s lips were still pinched in a look that read “not buying your shit”. Bucky pecked them and rubbed their noses together “I swear to you, Steve. Everything’s good.”

Steve stared at him for a long time before accepting Bucky’s answer. “Okay. You’ll have to say that to Dum-E, though. He kept swivelling in anxiety after you left. I swear, I think one day he’ll propose to your left arm.”

For once, Bucky was very happy HYDRA trained him to hide his emotions as before they could reach his face. His smile didn’t flinch in the slightest, even when he felt overpowered again by all the strange mix of emotions that had bugged him since Wilson’s joke. “Yeah, well, did you thought about bringing me cookies, or did Barton get to them already?” he asked, still perched on Steve.

He shivered when Steve’s hands rested on his hips, where the towel was riding low. He hadn’t bothered to get dressed yet. He could feel his boyfriend’s warmth through the wet fabric, and directly on the patch of skin where both thumbs stroked.

“Hmm, I did, you glutton. Swear to God, Buck, if it wasn’t for the serum, you’d have to roll your way to the battle.”

“Oh, yeah?” He smirked, and put his hand on Steve’s crotch. The Captain wasn’t hard yet, but Bucky knew exactly which button to push. “Coming from you, Mr ‘Well I Have To Eat All 12 Donuts Buck Or They’ll Go Bad', it’s a bit offensive. And besides, I’m only a glutton for you, sweetheart.”

Steve was still in his uniform. So tight it almost clung to his skin. Bucky stroked at his length through the fabric and pressed the heel of his palm to the base. Steve bit back a moan.

“For the gorgeous sounds you make,” He kept running his mouth, “for the pretty sight you give me every time I make you feel good. Every. Damn. Time.”

“Bucky…” Steve panted, half hard now.

“Take your clothes off,” Bucky smirked and grind their crotches. His cock was hardening, too. “Wait, actually, I wanna make you come in it. So every time you wear your suit, you don’t forget you’re mine.”

Steve moaned.

********

Bucky was jolted awake by a headbutt. His metal arm shot out and caught his assailant before even opening his eyes. Bucky found him to be strangely light and furry. As he blinked awake, he understood why. Destiel stared at him, the skin of his neck still caught in Bucky’s left hand. Bucky relaxed.

“Jeez, Des,” he mumbled while rubbing his face with his palm, then bringing the cat closer to look in its eyes, “Stop coming in the bedroom like that. One day you’re gonna see your Daddies doing something you really don’t want to see.” Destiel only meowed and licked his nose in response.

Turning his head, Bucky groaned. It wasn’t even dawn yet, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. Sleeping was hard enough for him, with all the nightmares and the sudden panic attacks. Steve, however, hadn’t even batted an eyelash at the commotion that had just transpired. His features were softened and his hair was a mess, like some chaos of a golden halo.  He looked younger like this. Steve must have been exhausted to be so out which made Bucky smug. It was the nights that Bucky _really_ wore him out that he slept so well after. The night before they had gotten to six.

Another meow, more indignant, drew his attention back to Destiel, who was trying to gnaw at his fingers. Well, if he didn’t want to be hung like a chandelier, he shouldn’t have to annoyed Bucky in the first place.

“Shh, okay, okay,” he muttered lowly, at the risk of waking his boyfriend up. Holding the cat in one arm and grabbing his underpants with the other, he tip-toed out of the room with all the silence of the Winter Soldier.

 

Once the door of the room was safely closed, he lightly dumped the pet.

“Y’know, you should really stop creeping like that. You were that close to ending in a smash of blood and fur.”

Destiel just rubbed along his bare leg. Bucky sighed and squatted to scratch between the cat’s ear, earning a long purr for his efforts.

“I don’t exactly want to deal with a pissed off Steve, and I’ve kinda grown attached to you too, so please, stop trying to get killed by my enhanced former killer reflexes.”

That was the kind of sentence indicating he needed a coffee ASAP.

Not wanting to disturb Sleeping Beauty with the loud sound of their Stark-sspresso machine, Bucky aimed for the communal kitchen, yawning. He was actually a bit surprised to find no-one in there. It was very unusual that the whole team spent a quiet night all together. They all had demons and PTSD that could creep at bedtime and deny them peaceful dreams. So more often than not, at least one of them ended up in the kitchen, zoning out while absently swirling a spoon in a mug. Bucky was happy to find it wasn’t the case.

Destiel, whom had trailed along his side the whole time, went at his bowl and stared at Bucky expectedly. The sniper snorted.

“Oh, I get it. It was all part of your evil plan just to get fed, huh? Evil is what you are. Should have called you Crowley.”

“Crowley is not evil, he just wanted to be loved.”

Bucky startled. Of course it was Natasha. She was the only one he couldn’t hear coming - well, her and his own damn cat.

“Christ, what is with you all trying to scare me first thing in the morning?” he grumbled.

She swept in in her satiny robe. “I could say it’s just because you’re losing your touch, but we both know it’s just because I’m the best.”

“Ah, ah.” Bucky deadpanned.

What? He couldn’t be sassy without a proper coffee.

As he was fixing himself a cup - the steamy, delicious smell already welcoming him - he noted Natasha… waiting. Arms crossed on her chest, hip and head cocked on the same side. 

Oh damn.

The redhead cocked an elegant eyebrow, “So, do you want to talk about it?”

“Dunno what you’re talking about,” he grunted, not meeting her eyes.

The damn thing with Nat was not just that she always managed to make you talk. That was part of her job, Bucky knew, just like part of his used to be never to divulge anything. That, given who they were - who the whole team was - was rather common.

Bucky himself was rather good at making people spit the truth out. No, the damn thing was The Look. Once she had given you The Look, you knew it’s just a matter of minutes. It wasn’t even murder eyes like Bucky, who still used that trick on Tony and his stupid jokes). It was more of a “We both know you’ll speak so please save us some time” look.

Didn’t matter. Bucky would not let her crack him so easily this time.

“It’s nothing.”

She kept fixing him with her snakelike stare.

“I swear!”

More of The Look.

“… Listen, it’s stupid, so really, it’s fine.”

The green eyes didn’t blink. Bucky countered it with his blankest face.

Damn.

“… I can’t get a fucking joke of Sam’s outta my brain. Happy?” he snarled, annoyed. Sometimes he forgot he was the one who taught her; maybe that’s why she’s so good.

Of course he could have lasted longer or walked away, but he was actually tired of ruminating this shit and he knew Nat was the best to talk with.

She didn’t seemed to catch on to what he was talking about.

“Meaning?”

Bucky huffed. He really didn’t want to have to sum it up because he knew it would sound cheesy as fuck.

“Remember when I said Steve and I were the best duo and Clint said it was you guys? Sam teased us saying it wasn’t a Spouse Contest.” And yup, it sure did sound worse coming out of his mouth. Pathetic as fuck. Like a naïve, lovesick schoolgirl daydreaming about her crush. Only lacking a shitty pink blurred light and some stupid guitar in the background or whatever to complete the picture. Bucky wanted to cringe. He was a super enhanced sniper, former deadliest assassin in the world, and actual badass Avenger, for Christ’s sake.

But Nat didn’t looked surprised or judging. “Alright. So, you think about marrying him?”

“I didn’t say I was willingly considering it, just that Sam’s stupid words are stuck in my head. It’ll pass.”

She rolled her eyes. “Stop playing stupid, Bucky. That’s the same. Why should it have to pass? You think about marrying your boyfriend, no need to make a big deal out of it.”

Bucky frowned, lips tightly shut behind his mug.

The redhead sighed, “Why is it making you mad? Almost everyone thinks about that stuff. Even Tony. Once when he was drunk, he confessed to me he wanted to propose to Pepper.”

“Yeah but…”

“Oh, I get it. You’re not sure about how long what you feel for Steve will last.”

The glare he gave her honestly rivalled with the Winter Soldier’s and it was not an act.

“Don’t you fucking dare say that. Even less to my face. I’ve probably always loved him and I’m damn sure I always will. Even after all the shit we’ve been through, I fucking know I want to spend the rest of my life with him, ‘cause he’s both reason of why I’m still alive and why I still want to live.”

He understood it was exactly what his friend wanted to hear when he saw her smug, knowing smile. She had struck that particular nerve on purpose.

“See? Stop being a knucklehead, that’s Steve’s job. Just do what you want.” Her eyes softened “What’s stopping you? Look at your life with him. You’ve loved each other since when Steve was sick and could have died anytime-” While she spoke, Bucky saw flashes of his damaged memory that screamed how accurate it was. _Steve’s face with a bloody lip, snarling that he had a bully on the rope._ _Steve, pale and sick coughing his lungs off, trying to reassure Bucky he was okay._ “-You loved each other when both of you could have die during the war-” _Steve saving him from Hydra the first time as Captain America._ “-You loved each other at a time when people loving the same gender could be killed for that-” _Steve asking to make love to him that first time in the tent._ “-You loved each other when you were being mind-broken by Hydra and while Steve was frozen-” _Steve’s face he had summoned in his mind when Hydra had strapped him to the chair for the first time._ “-You loved each other when Steve thought you were dead and you had hidden Steve in a corner of your memory so Hydra wouldn’t take him away from you-” _Steve’s face when he had recognised Bucky under the muzzle but Bucky hadn’t ._ “ -And you loved each other to the point of putting your life In the other’s hands even when you were enemies.” _Steve, bloody and trusting, murmuring he was with Bucky until the end of the line._

_When he laughed or frowned or smiled or slept, when they made love and when he soothed Bucky from his nightmares._

It all flashed in a heartbeat but left the sniper as if he had taken a nosedive out of an airplane. And if his eyes were a little wet, neither him nor Natasha said anything about it.

“But I… I don’t need a ring or a fucking piece of paper to stay with him.”

“I know,” Nat smiled, still speaking softly, “And that’s exactly why you should do it. Besides… you wouldn’t have been able to, in the forties. And unfortunately, some people still think you shouldn’t.” She mused, and looked at the window. New York was still fast asleep, not much light to be seen outside. “You know what Thor once said? That on Asgard, the story of your love and how strong it was facing all these difficulties would have inspired a lot of songs.” She smiled, “Well, I’m doing the non-Shakespearian-like translation but the point is: you can do something you wouldn’t have dreamt of being able to do before while simultaneously flipping off the people who think your love counts for less. You can make a dream of yours come true and by doing so, create songs to people who need hope. Now that you and Steve have overcome the worst and that you’re allowed to be free in one more way, why wouldn’t you, if you want to?”

Bucky honest to God didn’t know what to say. It was true and beautiful and convincing and poetic.

“Can I borrow you to propose?”

“Nope.”

“Just one of your inspiring speeches then?”

“Nice try, Barnes.”

He chuckled and looked at the same window Natasha had observed, then felt something rubbing at his leg. Destiel mewled for attention- and probably food. Rolling his eyes with a fond smile, he picked the bag of croquettes.

“How come you can talk anyone into marriage and haven’t tied the knot yourself yet?”

The woman shrugged delicately, “Not on my plans for now. My relationship with Clint isn’t as long as yours with Steve.”

“And Tony… Des, stop that,” Bucky added sternly when the kitten tried to play with a glint of light on his metal arm.

“Hasn’t proposed yet,” Nat supplied, “But I think he will soon. Six months tops.”

Bucky whistled. “Well who knew he Avengers Tower would become the Sappy Hearts Tower.”

********

Taking advantage of one time Steve won’t catch him with his hand in the proverbial cookie jar, (he had been invited to attend a to a school ceremony or something), Bucky logged into their shared StarkPad and started typing ‘how to propose’.

Yup, he knew it sounded dumb. Dumb as fuck, even. He didn’t like it, because it totally brought water to the Turning-in-a-sappy-cliché mill. But he was still lost in this new century, and even if Steve and him came from the same time, Bucky wasn’t totally sure how to do normal stuff like that.

Well no, nor normal, you don’t propose every Tuesday, but non-badass or non-Avengers stuff. And Steve deserved the best, so Bucky would do his damn best, even if it meant looking on Internet like he had the starring role in a bad sitcom. No one would know he got that low.

He clicked on the first link, ‘Top 5 most Perfect Ways to Propose’, and instantly regretted his decision. The pastel background with little petals and little hearts, the overly curly font, the first picture which was of two hands forming a heart in the sunset, he had underestimated the cheesiness he would be confronted with.

“The things I do for you, punk,” he muttered under his breath.

Skipping the introduction, to avoid losing both time and his resolution, he looked at the first section of the article.

**#5: The scene of your first date**

**Easy, often inexpensive, and sooo cute ! Who wouldn’t melt? It proves you remember your story details well and carries a lot of symbols. And this place is necessary already filled with fond memories, so the emotion will be even more intense!**

Bucky flinched.  That didn’t start well. The remembering thing was a bit ironic in his case and… what could be considered as their first date? The time Bucky made Steve go on the the rollercoaster at Coney Island and then threw up all over him after? The one time in their tiny apartment where they rutted against each other without even talking about it after? Or when they fucked in a tent, in the middle of World War II without even admitting their feelings before and he had a panic attack? When they re-united and he wasn’t even capable of recognising Steve and punched him almost to death in that Helicarrier? When they finally got their heads out of their asses in their Avenger’s apartment?

Alright, he knew he was being a jerk. But none of that sounded good enough, with the conflicted if not bad memories each carried.

**#4  Somewhere Cold**

**Maybe a ski station or even a Nordic country if you have enough money!  Cold means coziness and extremely romantic situations! Stay warm in blankets together in front of the fireplace after spending the day marvelling at Mother Nature’s beauty, ice skating and taking a dip in the fresh water-**

Bucky didn’t even end this one. Ice. Just. No. For either of them.

**#3 At the beach**

**A classic that will never go out of style. Have a nice dinner on the sand then take their hand, lead them to the ocean and pop the question with the waves crashing softly at your feet. Choose sunset or nighttime to add to the glamour!**

Bucky wanted to throw his hands at the celling.

“ ‘F course, I’ll do that while trying to calm him the fuck down after his anxiety attack ‘cause he can’t stand oceans, having been trapped in it for 70 fucking years!”

...It was really getting complicated. And New York’s beaches weren’t exactly what he would call ‘awe inspiring’.

Some superior force was deliberately trying to discourage him.

**#2: Italy**

**One of the most romantic country ever ! Plus you have so many choices! A gondola ride under moonlight, with the Temple of Venus behind by sunset (makes great photos!) or even Juliet’s Balcony in Verona !**

Bucky lips twitched in disbelief. Ok so first: Juliet’s Balcony? Seriously? But then again, Steve might like it. He had always loved literature and was a romantic at heart. And right now, Bucky would pay to have a bit of that romantic shit in him, because he couldn’t tell what the appeal was. But if it was something that could please Steve… Then again, should Bucky bring him on the balcony or do it under? Or re-enact the scene?

_O Steve, Steve ! Wherefore art thou such a punk?_

Yup, no. That was not happening.

Then he remembered he wasn’t allowed in Italy for the next several years, since the “diplomatic incident” involving that homophobic Senator. He rolled his eyes at the memory.

So no Italy for them, then.

He really hoped the last one would be the miraculous, life-saver one.

**#1 Disneyland**

**Oh my God but who wouldn’t dream of a fairytale proposal ?!**

Maybe someone who can’t go to that stupid park because they’re freaking Avengers and wouldn’t make three steps without being stopped by people?!

And even if they went disguised, his metal arm would give him away.

Huffing, Bucky cleared the history and turned the screen down. He rubbed the heel of his palm at his eyes, lips pinched tight. Obviously, proposing to your Avenger boyfriend while being himself a superhero, topped with both their fair share of tragic pasts, would be more complicated than a random proposal. Bucky was getting desperate. And with desperate times come desperate measures.

********

“Congrats, Bucky Bear. I have to say I’m surprised ‘cause I didn’t peg you for the romantic type, but hey, that’s what came with being old-school- or plain old in your case. So, when will you ask Golden Boy to be the Mrs to your Mr Smith?”

One sentence and Bucky already regretted involving Tony. He also regretted the screwdriver Butterfingers had let drop while rising its mechanic arms to cheer in happiness hadn’t planted itself in the genius’s foot.

“I’m seriously going to punch you” he warned, using the Soldier’s look.

Tony dramatically slapped his own hand on his torso, “And here I thought we were friends.”

“Something like that. Doesn’t mean you’re not a huge pain in my ass.”

“Oh, I’m flattered by your dirty-talk but we’re both almost engaged, Buckaroo.”

“Yeah and that’s why I wanted to talk to you in the first place.” That and Sam was away, so Bucky had to settle for Stark. “What am I supposed to do?”

Tony eyed him critically, then started talking very slowly, like he would with a child, “Well you choose someone you really, really like a lot, you go see them and open your mouth to form words-“

Bucky honestly itched to hit him, “Tony-“

“Okay, okay, jeez, keep your cool-oh, that was good. Anyway, what do you mean, what are you supposed to do? You know he’ll say yes.”

“Just like you know Pepper will say yes and yet, you haven’t made your move.”

Tony sighed, then went back at whatever strange engineering thing he was doing. “We’re both very busy and I want what’s best for her. I guess that’s what you want, too.”

 Bucky nodded.

“So here’s a little advice: wait for the best moment. Everything have to be perfect. You want to create a perfect memory, start by making it a perfect moment. You used to be a sniper so you know what I mean: you prepare everything then wait until you see the ideal window then, you shoot. Well, don’t shoot Cap, if we want to stay literal you can bang him afterward but-”

“Remind me to put Pepper on the candidate list for beatification, that woman’s a saint for putting with you.”

****

One week later, Bucky hadn’t made a lot of progress. He was on the couch, his arm swung around his boyfriend, catching up on another movie from the “Pop Culture Survival List for Grandpas” as Tony liked to call it. From time to time, Bucky felt Steve brush a kiss to his jawline, or he would press his lips to the blond’s temple. Sweet. Domestic.

And yet Bucky couldn’t fully enjoy it because he was still fucking thinking about how to propose.

As the credits started to roll, Steve, still tucked up next to him, nuzzled the warm place where  Bucky’s shoulder met his neck, like an overgrown Labrador wanting affection.

“Mmh. How’d ya like it ?”

Bucky pressed his lips to Steve’s forehead “Not bad, not my favorite though. Who recommended this one?”

“Um… think it was Clint.”

Bucky snorted “Of course.”

Steve smiled fondly then winded his arms around his lover. “You know what could have made it even better?” he asked, manoeuvring himself on Bucky’s lap to face him.

The sniper let his thumbs stroke the fabric covering Steve’s hipbones, and almost purred when he felt strong, yet nimble fingers play with his hair. Well, if his babydoll wanted to go there…

“No. Tell me, sweetheart, what would have made it better?” Bucky let his flesh arm slide to cup his boyfriend’s rounded ass.

“Hot cocoa, which we couldn’t make because someone forgot to buy milk after emptying the last carton,” Steve sassed, flicking at Bucky’s nose.

Even though the mood totally changed, the former Sergeant felt warmth pooling in his guts. Not in a sexual way, but just because they could shift from sexy to domestic teasing with such smoothness. He saw his punk of a lover trying to make a stern face but failing miserably. The tenderness was too visible in the blue summer sky that was Steve’s eyes.

Bucky didn’t even try to hide how little a fuck he gave, and just shrugged with a contrite smile. “Whoops. Sorry? Are you gonna make me sleep on the couch?” 

“No, I’m feeling magnanimous today so I won’t banish you. You’re lucky I love you.”

“And that you sleep better I’m spooning you.”

Steve eyes crinkled, “That, too.”

Bucky let an amused puff of air out before bringing his cocky lover in to kiss him.

When they parted, Steve’s index tapped lightly on his nose. “But that means I’ll drag your ass outta bed to go to the bodega with me tomorrow morning.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.”

The blond nipped him on the chin softly, before getting up. Bucky already missed his warmth. He rose up too, as they headed towards their ensuite to start their bedtime rituals. Busying himself with his toothbrush, Steve chuckled

“I really thought you would have thrown this away as soon as Sam left,” pointing at the His & His cup with his chin.

Bucky shook his head, rolling his eyes “Friendly gift, friendly gift… More of an I’m-Sorry-I- hadn’t-understood-you-were-dating gift.” He start brushing his teeth “We weren’t egshagtly shubtle, shoush.” He added, toothpaste spilling down his chin. Steve eyed him warily.

“Aj if we wouldah been.Took ush enouch time to short our shings out” Steve shot back in the same state, before he spat in the sink.

Yup, they were classy like that.

The Captain turned around to grab something to dry his mouth with. Bucky could still see his back in the mirror’s reflection.

“You know,” he carried on, “That’s one of the thing I like most in this century.”

“What, how fabric softener makes towels all fluffy?”

“Very funny, Buck.” Steve deadpanned. “I mean, if we were in the forties still, I wouldn’t be allowed to… Well, to live with you for starters, or at least, not for my whole life. Or to go to the grocery store holding hands with you. Here I can call you my boyfriend and introduce you to the whole world.”

Bucky mouth went dry like it always did when Steve started to talk like this. As if Bucky was the most precious thing in the world when really, he was not. Steve was the most valuable being in all of damn History, and Bucky was just the very lucky bastard who, by whatever fucking miracle it was, was allowed to stand by this man. Turning around to face the blond, Bucky silently cupped Steve’s cheek with his flesh hand. The other super soldier kept his eyes on his as he pressed a chaste but reverent kiss on the sniper’s calloused palm.

Something a bit painful but mostly sweet twisted in Bucky’s guts. “I love you” he said in a hoarse voice.

Steve’s grin was earnest “Love you too, Buck. If I could, I’d say it to the whole world to prove how happy and proud I am to be with you.”

A lightbulb moment.

He knew how he was going to propose.

****

The plan was simple. All he needed was a press conference or something. Which might be a bit tricky to get for a random citizen, but was rather frequent for a superhero. The media were always clawing at them for an interview, a scoop, a picture, anything. Bucky wasn’t a fan of all that shit but thankfully, he was a lot less sought after than Steve, Tony, or even Natasha. Though all Avengers were always invited, he had the choice to decline unlike some others.

A good dose of Murder Eyes got people off his case pretty quickly.

So he just had to accept the next one. And hope it wouldn’t take a month to happen.

Christ, if he had knew one day he’d wait for a fucking media conference to happen…

Fortunately, he was granted with an opportunity three days later. Following the appearance of new heroes, such as the Spider fanboying after Tony or the new king of Wakanda that had to pick up his father’s role after the latter passed away, a live broadcast press release had been organized by a major journal, to clarify what it changed for the Avengers and if some kind of alliance could be expected with them, among other things. So beside the new heroes, Fury had asked Steve to represent the team. Tasha would be in, too, because Pepper would be there and the redhead had become Ms. Potts’ unofficial bodyguard after some psycho tried to attack her.

“Would anyone else like to register?” Pepper asked, her StakPad in hand. Clint shook his head vehemently; Bruce, Wanda and Rhodes declined more politely; Sam said he already had a meeting with one of his vets for that day. Tony was working in his lab, but Pepper would probably ask him later, if it wasn’t already done.

It was now or never.

Bucky tried to muster all the casualness he could, “Actually, count me in.”

Seven pairs of surprised eyes turned to him; Natasha just cocked an eyebrow, smirking.

“Really, Barnes?” Clint asked in genuine bemusement, “That’s rare.”

Bucky just shrugged, “Can’t leave Stevie go welcome the newbies all alone, he’d scare them off.”

Clint just looked at him, nonplussed. “Sure, ‘cause you totally wont, Mr. I’m-so-possessive-I’ll-try-to-scare-my-boyfriend’s-pals-away?”

“Sam had personally insulted me.”

“Aw c’mon Barnes, won’t you ever shut up about that?”

“Nope, sorry Wilson.”

“Alright gentlemen,” the strawberry blonde woman said in an amused tone, “Bucky, if you decide you want to leave earlier at the press release, please, do tell me.”

“Shouldn’t be any problems but thanks, Pepper.”

As they exited the meeting, Natasha gave him that look that told him she knew everything rattling around inside of his brain. He promptly ignored her.

The following week arrived quickly, and with it, the press release.

 

Okay, so maybe it wouldn’t be as easy as he’d thought.

 

Before it even began, he didn’t feel comfortable. Didn’t like how crowded they were, with this huge crowd of people, the constant flashes of their cameras, sudden and loud noises, and  general feeling of agitation. The small door on the left hand wall seemed too far and he felt trapped, stuck between that and the journalists surrounding them. His vision had gone blurry, his metal arm had whirred as it recalibrated, He could feel a cold sweat trickling down his back. If he hadn’t been sure that he had definitively locked the Soldier away, Bucky was almost sure he would have had an episode.

Steve saw his state and immediately frowned concern.

The sniper felt a warm hand splaying on his back to anchor him, “Buck, you don’t have to do this. Pepper will understand. Do you want to leave?” The Captain’s eyes silently locked with Natasha across the room and she nodded, signalling her understanding.

The brunet shook his head, “Nah, it’s okay,” he managed to say, “’m fine. Just a bit overwhelmed. It’ll pass.” He gave a cracked chuckle. “When did you get over this shit?”

Steve offered a wan smile, “I didn’t,” he confessed, letting his hand slide to discreetly take Bucky’s under the big lectern. “Still hate this.”

The former Sergeant felt a pang of guilt at that. He was Steve’s partner and his sometimes Dom, he should be the one reassuring him.

The blond must had felt his internal self-reproach, because he immediately added, “Hey, stop it. I hate this but I’m used to it. Part of being Captain America and all.” He gave a weak shrug.

Before Bucky had the time to reply to that, mics were shoved in their palms, the moderator moved them on the side to take place at the center and someone screamed they were on the air.

Bucky kept Steve’s hand in his, but his anxiety had dropped now.

Fortunately, few journalists asked him direct questions - the Winter Soldier Glare did the trick to dissuade them. Steve, with his earnest eyes and fake smile, was less lucky.

“Captain Rogers, what do you think of this sudden increase of superheroes?”

“Captain Rogers, if more people feel the need to become heroes does that mean our world is less safe than five years ago?”

“Captain Rogers, would you be inclined to admit the new heroes as full time part of the Avengers or do you prefer to keep the team a small group and why?”

“Captain Rogers, are your and Tony Stark’s opinions about the new heroes another point of conflict and does it rekindles tensions between you?”

What the- Bucky honestly wanted strangle himself at that one. Why did people always exaggerate Steve and Tony’s relationship? Sure they argued frequently, but only because they were very different people, but that didn’t stop them from being great friends. And yet journalists tended to pick on it and try to add drama. Some months ago, the whole team had been dumbfounded when they had seen in the headlines: “STARK VS ROGERS, THE AVENGER’S CIVIL WAR : EVERYTHING FALLS APART !”

On the other hand, Bucky preferred yelling about how some people believed Steve and Tony hated each other than people yelling about how some people believed Steve and Tony fucked each other. The computer was still sitting in two pieces under the couch,

He blinked, zipping back to present. The new king of Wakanda - T’challa - was the one answering this time. The blond took advantage of the small reprieve to glance at Bucky and mouth, _You okay?_ Bucky nodded with a reassuring smile.

“Captain Rogers, some time ago the Avengers had officially welcomed a new agent in the form of James Barnes, who is present here. Can other heroes hope to join you or was your romantic relationship with Mr. Barnes a determining in this inclusion?”

Bucky froze, then felt anger rising “What the-”

Fortunately, Steve was quicker and interrupted him to answer the fucker - hipster with bleached hair called WOODS, by the little tag clipped on his shirt which indicated as well he worked for The Sun \- “As I already said, the Avengers are open about any form of help and if any of these brave men and women wanted to join us, we’ll hear them out and talk with them about it. I thought my first answer was clear but if you need to, I can expand on that. Or were you distracted then?”

Bucky smirked smugly. That was his punk. The best was, his perfectly polite tone would mostly provide the journalist to understand Steve had just basically just told him he did a shitty job. Takes that, Woods.

“Mr. Barnes,” another journalist - Afro-American woman with purple and blue dreadlocks, CAPLAN, for The Times \- “As the newest member of the Avengers, do you have any advice for the people who would wish to join the team?”

He glanced at Steve and his mouth went dry. It was now or never.

It felt like everything from his lips to his throat was coated in sandpaper. “I…” He darted his tongue to moisten his lips and took a deep breath. He didn’t want to ruin his perfect proposal with a slurred or stuttered speech. His hands were slightly shaking.

He looked at the red light on the camera, signaling it was rolling and focused on him, then at Steve, and took his chance.

“I’m not an example. Not because I’m dating the leader-” _once again, take that, you little shit from The Sun_ “-but because I’m not a hero. Even if I didn’t want to, I was made to do heinous things that I can’t make up for. Doing all I can to help people now, it’s not heroic, it’s the least I can do.”

“Buck- ” Steve started, but the sniper steamrolled over him without looking at him

“But I don’t regret being an Avenger and I understand why they’d like to join us. Not just because we’re cool-” that earned some chuckles “or because we’re strong. They’re as strong as us. But being an Avenger means being part of an incredible team and even more, work with the greatest man that exists. That’s you, Steve.” He said, finally turning to the blond.His heart was beating like mad in his chest. Adrenalin pulsed through his veins. Here and now, he was about to ask his best friend to marry him. He felt a bit feverish but ready. “Not only are you a great leader, you’re also the best human being that I know. What you’ve been through - what we’ve been through - it’s something not a lot of people can understand. You’re my brother in arms, my partner, my best friend and the love of my life.”

People started talking in the room, the noise buzzing through his ears. Steve was looking at him with a surprised yet soft, almost vulnerable expression. Had he understood what Bucky was about to do? The sky of winter held the sky of summer as they kept visual contact.

“People think you’re Captain America, the strong leader when that’s not what you are. Who you are. Without Steven Grant Rogers, there wouldn’t be Captain America. It’s neither the title nor the shield that are strong, it’s the man and the hands holding it. The same hand that know how to draw and how to pick hurt people up.”

That’s what Steve wanted: for them to shout their love at the face of the world.

“So, Steve Rogers…”

Or was it?

He could still see the red light of the camera as if it was taunting him.

“…You have to know…”

Then he realized.

He didn’t have a ring.

He managed to keep his facial expression the same, but he was crumbling in the inside.

 

Fuck!

 

“…that I love you. And that every hero should follow your example: never forget who they are, because at the end of the day, when we strip of our costume and title, that’s when we need to be the stronger. So if new heroes want to join the Avengers, we’ll welcome them, but they must never forget that they’re not just a title or a weapon or even a superpower.”

Bucky wanted to kick himself.

He was snapped from his mental yelling by someone crushing him in a fierce hug.

“I love you too,” Steve panted in his ear, mics far way, and the older man could hear a tightness in his lover’s voice, “Fuck, I love you so much…”

The flashes went mad as journalists verbally bombarded them, and maybe they already were before but Bucky hadn’t pay attention. Steve slightly pulled away, eyes a bit watery, and he grinned

“Did you plan this inspiring speech or were you struck by the moment?”

Bucky mentally thanked the lucky star he had stopped believe in: at least his fucked-up speech had been credible enough to not end in a senseless rambling and Steve hadn’t caught its intended purpose. So the brunet shrugged with his Brooklyn smirk

“Just wanted to see my sweetheart squirm with praises, I guess?”

The crowd’s frenzy hadn’t dimmed at all. Christ, had they never seen a couple hugging?

“Sergeant Barnes, does that mean you condemn your boyfriend’s function?” The guy from The Sun shouted

“Captain Rogers, do you have anything to say to the LGBT people watching us?” A redhead asked

“Sergeant Barnes, what do you have to answer to the people accusing you to use your relationship with Captain Rogers as a, _quote_ , ‘communication tool because of the pro-LGBT fashion?’ ” Someone in the back yelled.

“Kids these days,” An old man with white hair and glasses - LEE, indicated his label, for Marvel \- muttered while rolling his eyes

“Captain Rogers-!”

“Sergeant Barnes-!”

Pepper stepped in with a polite yet sharp smile and took the moderator’s microphone, “That would be all, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for your attention.”

It didn’t stop the journalists going wild but at least it meant they were allowed to finally exit. As they were backstage, a deep and polite voice called out “Mister Barnes?” Turning around, Bucky saw it was T’Challa, the Black Panther. The African king smiled kindly

“Your words were full of truth, and I admire you for standing out for your love in front of all these cameras.”

Bucky felt a bit awkward. He hadn’t planned to make himself look like a show-off. “Usually, this kind of display is Tony’s expertise.”

T’Challa chuckled warmly. Bucky relaxed. “Well, from what I’ve seen, his speeches are less inspiring than that one.” His eyes shifted on Steve “I also agree with the fact that you and Captain Rogers are excellent leaders. I wanted to personally tell you that you are both welcomed in Wakanda, if one day you wished to come.”

Steve smiled and slightly inclined his head “That would be our pleasure. Thank you, Your Highness.”

A female voice called in the distance, “Brother !”

T’Challa crossed his arms on his chest and saluted them goodbye before joined the two women waiting for him.

As they were left alone, Steve grinned “Well looks like we’ve found our next vacation destination. What do you think about it, Buck?”

Bucky gave a teasing smirk and pressed a smooch at the blond’s temple “Can’t wait to see you sunbathing naked all day, doll.”

Inside, he was still kicking himself. At least he had realized his mistake before doing anything irreversible. But it was maybe time to go ring shopping…

****

One week after the “Grand Fail”, as Bucky had morosely taken to call it, he finally pinpointed the problem with his first plan - you know, except for the missing ring.

It lacked intimacy.

Sure, Steve had said he wanted to shout their love in the world’s face, but it didn’t necessarily mean he wanted to be overly exposed in such a personal moment. Steve wasn’t a flaunty show-off; he would have been embarrassed. And what if he had felt trapped? Because of course he would have accepted if Bucky had proposed to him on live television, just to avoid the sniper any form of embarrassment. Steve would have been forced to accept… How hadn’t Bucky thought about that? He was such an idiot. He grit his teeth just thinking about it. Hadn’t even prepared a decent speech. Far from the perfection he aimed for.

The positive takeaway was he could use this fiasco for its instructional purposes, and thanks to some freaky miracle, his boyfriend hadn’t figured Bucky’s intentions out. Considering Steve could read Bucky like an open book, he was counting his blessings. Always take the positive, as Sam said. Fortunately, two days after the live broadcast, the ideal proposal setting was brought to him on a silver platter.

Wanda, Clint, and him had just finished a mission that had ended particularly messily. At least now they could accurately say that some alien species had green blood that smelled like rotten fruit. Bucky though he might have a bit of trouble slipping in a conversation. The three of them had been covered in sticky, queasy alien slime that made Bucky feel like he’d just dunked himself in liquid garbage.

“Dammit, I hope it comes out of hair easily,” Clint had grunted, flicking both arms in a sharp movement.

Bucky had heartily agreed. And Barton at least had the luxury of having short hair. But what really upset him was how this crap had splattered all over his SIG-Sauer P220. He was sure some had managed to run inside the barrel, and that would be a pain in the arse to clean up (spoiler alert: it had.)

Wanda had scrunched her nose in disgust. “Okay, this calls for a massive post mission self-reward. Bubble bath, wine, and every single block of chocolate I can physically carry. Urgh, I’d kill for a risotto of pelt in chanterelles and truffles.”

“You sound way too much like Tony.”

“Actually Pepper helped me discover it. She invited me to this really nice restaurant where Tony takes her for their really romantic dates. Apparently when he does, he plays the whole game. She admitted its kind of grown on her.”

“Urban people, I swear.”

“Aw, come on Clint,” Wanda had laughed, making one of Hawkeye’s arrow levitate toward him, “Everybody has the fantasy of an extravagant fancy date at least once. Don’t tell me you haven’t ever done it with Nat, I know otherwise.” She winked, tapping her temple.

As Clint was vehemently groaning, Bucky mentally smacked his hand on his forehead.

Of course! Why hadn’t he think about it sooner? Nothing could possibly beat a romantic date for the best proposal, right? He just had to make it the most romantic date in all of History.

Then he remembered how he didn’t have a single drop of romanticism in his body.

But because his maybe-actually-existing lucky star had seemingly returned, an idea popped in Bucky’s skull as he was heading back to the Tower. Steve was still debriefing a mission of his own, so Bucky had a bit of time prepare his plan. Which when he said it like that, kind of sounded a bit like a secret plot, but oh well.

As soon as he closed the door of the apartment, Bucky looked at the roof. “Erm, hey, FRIDAY? Could you please help me with something?”

“Of course, Sergeant Barnes.” The smooth voice of the AI immediately answered in its usual kind tone. “How can I be of any assistance?”

“First of all it has to stay between you and me, Steve absolutely is not on the privy list.”

“Of course, Sergeant Barnes. As long as it is not against my core program to protect the Tower’s residents safety; otherwise, I’ll have to report to Sir and Captain Rogers.”

“No no, it’s totally safe ! I, er, I’m planning a surprise for Steve. I want to take him on a date and I need it to be perfect. So I was wondering if you could find me a restaurant with an intimate, romantic vibe for a big occasion? If possible in the city or not too far? ”

“Would you like me to solely focus my research on a refined Internet basis or do you wish to include the residents of the Tower most recurrent choices for that kind of event? ”

“Er, yes, I think that’d be a good idea. To see what our friends choose.”

“Analysing process. The most suitable place for your request seems to be the Fin’Amor, over a thirty minute car drive away. I strongly advise you to ask Sir’s help to obtain a reservation within a quicker amount of time.”

“Great, thanks, FRIDAY.”

“It was my pleasure, Sergeant Barnes.”

Bucky needed to check on the restaurant’s site, he wasn’t one to blindly throw himself in an unknown place, but at least he was getting somewhere. For now, though, the highest priority was to take a shower. That freaking alien jelly-like guts started to dry and Bucky was almost sure the green footprints he left on their polished wooden floors was going to stain.

Once clean - God bless good water pressure - and with a towel wrapped around his waist, the former assassin took his tablet and made a quick search for the Fin’Amor. As he let his flesh thumb slide, pictures showed an elegant, glamorous restaurant with marble slabs, ivy covered colonnades and little alcoves. Yep, that’s what romantic was supposed to look like, right? Remembering Steve could arrive any second, Bucky asked FRIDAY to warn him when Steve would be at their floor and picked up where he had left.

Next he looked at the reviews: three quarters affirmed with long paragraphs how it was an incredible venture in a magnificent setting, ideal for a rendezvous with your other half; the remaining quarter alleged with prim, snobbish vocabulary that the food was good; the whole alluded to how trendy it was but recommended to book at least five months early. Bucky wasn’t one to abuse the privileges of being an Avenger slash knowing important people but hey, his perfect proposal was at stake. So without any hesitation, he took his phone an tapped once on Tony’s contact picture labelled “GENIUS BILLIONAIRE ASSHOLE”. Two seconds after the ringing started, a loud voice answered.

“Evening, Buckybear ! How you doing?”

“Hey Tony,” Bucky had resigned himself about Stark’s silly nicknames “Good, and you? I’m not bothering you, am I?”

“Nah, not at all! I’m working on an improved version of Sam’s wings: I try to make them lighter and incorporate a- NO, BUTTERFING-“ Bucky winced at the smashing sound picked on the other end of the phone and heard Tony grumbling “Don’t give me that look, I told you not to touch anything. I swear, next time you’re staying out of the lab! Sorry ‘bout that. You were saying?”

“Um, I could use a bit of help. I need a quick reservation for two at the, huh” he quickly glanced back at his StarkPad “Fin’Amor.”

“Well well Buckaroo ! Playing big, are we?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, he could hear his friend’s smirk. “Tony-”

“Yeesh, keep cool big guy. No need to threaten me: I can have you a table for this week-end. I’ll make sure they remain discreet and place you somewhere isolated to guarantee your privacy.”

Bucky felt his lips turn in an affectionate smile. As much as Tony like to make fun of everyone and play the annoying shithead (which he kind of was sometimes), Howard’s son was a very dedicated friend constantly trying to make his loved ones’ lives easier.

“Hey FRIDAY, is Steve’s schedule clear this Saturday?”

“Captain Rogers is required for a meeting with director Fury from 09:00 hours to 10:30 hours; otherwise, his schedule is completely clear.”

“Then it’s settled,” the engineer’s voice said as a buzzing sound resonated from his side of the phone, “I’ll text you the time ASAP.”

“Sergeant Barnes, I’m sorry to interrupt but Captain Rogers just got out of the elevator and will shortly be there.”

“Alright, gotta go then. Thanks, Tony, you’re the best. A real Fairy Godmother.”

“De nada, Cinbuckella.”

Just as Bucky was ending the call, the door of their bedroom opened on Steve. The blond shamelessly checked the other man out, Bucky realising he was still only covered by a towel around his waist.

“Hello to you too,” Steve said with a goofy grin.

“I wanna take you to a date. Saturday evening,” Bucky blurted out.

Steve chuckled, “Yeah? Sounds good.” He crossed the three steps separating them and pecked him on the lips. “Too bad you already showered, I would have joined you.”

“Believe me, you wouldn’t have right away unless you wanted alien spleen under your fingernails. The mission we were sent ended up… messy.”

“You’re wounded?” Steve asked immediately, eyebrows drawing together in concern.

“Nah, just covered in alien juice.” Bucky gently pushed some blond strands that had fallen over the Captain’s forehead. “What about you? How did the mission go?”

Steve leaned into the contact like a cat. “Hm-hm. Easy, I guess.”

“Last time you told me that, you still had two broken ribs.”

“Maybe I want you to check my body out? Making sure I’m not hurting anywhere?” Steve teased, skimming his lips against the others.

Bucky’s smirk was full of promises, “If that’s what you want, babydoll…”

This week-end, he would ask the love of his life to spend the rest of their time together. And it would be perfect, because Stevie deserved nothing but perfection. But for now, the Sergeant could settle for giving his soon-to-be fiancé a perfect orgasm.

The hand on Steve’s face slid to the golden hair, tilting the Captain’s head for a wet, warm kiss, and as Bucky withdrew with a last flick of tongue, making the blond moan, he took the other man’s hand to lead him in the still steamy bathroom, playful grin tugging his mouth.

*****

When Saturday arrived, Bucky was ready. What Tony had said when he had come for advice was not irrelevant: the sniper needed to assess the situation like he would with a mission. Work efficiently, fast but not rushed, keep calm, be prepared, take into account all variables and possibilities. Truth to be told, linking such unknown territory to a well-known one was rather comforting.

Bucky had told Steve they were going somewhere fancy so they needed to dress smart. His boyfriend-soon-to-be-fiancé was currently showering, from the sound of the running water in the adjacent bathroom. Bucky would have loved to join his lover there - his cock twitched at the sole thought of Steve, body flushed and smattered in water drops - but as tempting and relaxing hot, steamy shower sex was, Bucky didn’t want to risk being late and, consequentially, losing their reservation.

Alright, time for last-minute check:

Call Happy to pick them up at 8:00 PM sharp? Checked.

Black suit wrinkle and stains-free? Checked.

Ring tucked in his pocket? Double checked.

Decent speech made and memorized? Checked.

Hair combed? Checked.

He had even shaved three days ago: clean, but allowing enough of that stubble Steve loved rubbing on his skin.

Bucky reached for his pocket once more, making sure to feel the hard texture of the little velvety box encasing the ring. When Bucky had saw the simple yet gorgeous white gold band, it immediately had reminded him of Steve.

Bucky was excited and yet incredibly nervous. What if he messed up once again? What if Steve didn’t like the ring? What if he managed to lose it in the car or worse, during the admittedly very short walk from the limo to the restaurant? Or if paparazzi jumped on them and ruined it? Or if people came up every two seconds asking for pictures with Captain America, ruining the romance? Or-

“Hey Buck, do I need to wear a tie or is just a suit fancy en-wow.”

Steve’s voice snapped him back to present. The blond, wearing a towel low on his hips, shamefully racked his eyes on Bucky’s form.

“You look beautiful.”

A warm feeling pooled pleasantly in the former assassin’s stomach. “Thanks, babydoll.”

 Just as brazenly, he eyed the sculpted body facing him. Bucky couldn’t help but lick his lips. All this bared flesh teased him and he wanted nothing more than push Steve on the bed, strip him of this offending towel and make love to him until morning. Bucky crossed the distance between them and cupped his lover’s cheek, still pink from hot water.

Not looking away from the soldier’s eyes, Steve tilted his head to gently draw Bucky’s thumb near his mouth, barely pressing his plush lips to the callused pad.

“How about we stay here instead and just eat dessert all night long?” Steve whispered tantalisingly, before sucking the last knuckle. A shiver travelled down the sniper’s spine at the slow glide of the blond’s wet tongue on his skin.

Bucky really had to fight his desire to give in. Admittedly, awesome sex with his awesome boyfriend sounded far less stressful than proposing. But once again, the purpose wasn’t exactly the same. Plus, he was sure Steve and him would celebrate their engagement with celebratory sex just after he’d popped the question, so there would be time for smut later.

“As nice as you sound, I really wanna try this new restaurant with you,” Bucky lied with a chaste kiss on the blond’s lips, “But as soon as we’ll go back home, we’ll have another kind of dessert with as much seconds as you want.” He promised with a roll of his hips, pressing his pelvis against Steve’s. “Now get dressed so we don’t make Happy wait too much, you tempting little minx,” he added with a slap on the towel-covered ass for good measure.

Steve yelped a laugh, “Sir, yes Sir.”

****

The pictures weren’t lying: the restaurant was as wealthy as it had seemed there. A lifetime ago, when he was just a boy from Brooklyn, Bucky would have scoffed if someone had told him he’d ever go in such a place. Better even, with Steve Rogers, his boyfriend and hopefully soon fiancé. The simple thought made warmth pool in his stomach. He reinforced his grip on Steve’s hand in his. The Captain noticed “Is everything okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, just a bit nervous. There’s… a lot of fancy people, ‘s all.”

It was only half a lie: almost all the tables were occupied, and the few that weren’t had a little “Reserved” sign. Everybody wore either some designer suit or cocktail dress, holding dainty glasses of champagne or wine with an indolent grasp, wrist lazily bent and fingers slacked. But the amount of people wasn’t the reason why Bucky’s heart was pumping like a crazy hummingbird. He was glad Steve was holding his left hand, immune to sweaty palms.

As they made their way toward the reception, an elegant Asian woman clad in black and white asked with a perfect British accent, “Good evening gentlemen. Do you have a reservation?”

“ Yes er, Mister Barnes.”

“Of course. Please follow me to your table.”

Tony hadn’t lied when he had said he’d ask for somewhere private. The couple were led to one of the little alcove Bucky had seen on the pictures, too many cutleries and a lit candelabra already set on the immaculate tablecloth. As they sat, Steve’s eyes looked downcast and Bucky tightly crossed his arms on the table.

The woman gracefully handed them two leather-covered menus and informed “A waiter will soon reach to you to take your orders. I hope you’ll enjoy your evening with us.” Bucky gave a short nod of thank.

Bucky didn’t miss how in awe Steve looked, looking everywhere like a curious kitten. He mentally patted himself on the back: his lover seemed to like the décor. As he was reading his mind, the Captain offered a stunning grin, “It’s beautiful, Buck.”

That relaxed Bucky a bit, “’M glad you like it, babydoll.”

A man in the same uniform as the hostess arrived to greet them. “Good evening gentlemen, welcome to Fin’Amor, I’ll be your waiter tonight. Would you like an aperitif to start?”

“A bottle of champagne, please,” Bucky immediately said.

The waiter nodded, “Of course, Sir. I’ll be back with your drink shortly.”

As the man walked away, Bucky noted Steve looking funnily at him. His superhearing allowed him to catch the soft thumps of Steve’s foot lightly tapping on the ground

“Have I got something on my face?”

“No no, I’m just surprised. You’re not one for champagne usually. But hey, I guess that goes with this fancy stuff. Ordering a beer here would have been weird,” Steve shrugged with a kind smile, before fidgeting a bit.

Bucky’s throat became instantly dry, but he hid it with a smirk. “Guess I just wanted to treat my sweetheart nice.”

The Captain’s hand reached softly to his on the table and intertwined their fingers. “You _always_ treat me nice, Buck.”

“Yes, but I wanted this to be perfect because you deserve nothing less than the best.” The former assassin pointed out, stroking the blond’s long artist fingers, riddled with calluses they were. “Now let’s take a look at the menus or we’ll make this poor waiter go and return for nothing.”

Even though he had said that, Bucky kept glancing nervously at Steve. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth and he kept throwing glances at his lover from above the booklet.

_Sappy romantic comedy:1, Bucky:0._

Steve’s light chuckle broke the sniper’s self-inducted awkwardness. “Oh my God, I have never even heard of half of the stuff on this menu.” The blond noted, slightly baking away from his menu.

“Superhero’s lifestyle is way less glamour than what people think,” Bucky shrugged with a tiny smile. His shoulders relaxed a bit. “Maybe we’ll discover new tastes. A lot of comments on their website says their chicken breast with truffles is, quote, the most delicious dish in the world.”

“Sorry but nothing, and absolutely nothing, could beat Miss Foster’s burger. D’you remember it?”

B         ucky didn’t know what surprised him most: how soft Steve’s voice was when asking that, or the fact that he exactly remembered. “ She used to make the bread herself and never shared her secret with anyone. It was so doughy inside and crisp outside, and there was so much ketchup that it always would run down our hands…”

Steve’s face lit up, smile reaching his eyes. “Yes ! And you always asked if she could add extra pickles for you !”

“You always managed to have the meat slip out of the bread halfway,” Bucky kept on, “And you ended up eating it from the bottom like a hamster.”

“Oh, shush, at least I wasn’t the one who systematically made a mess of my shirt when eating!”

“Are you insinuating I’m a pig, Rogers?” The sergeant asked in faux-outrage.

Steve tried to keep a stern face but the teasing reflected in his tone “If it makes you feel better, you’re a very cute pig. Cuter than Waggle.”

“So not only you’re insulting me but in addition, you’ve watched Clint’s list of cartoons?”

“Hey! Gravity Falls is one of the greatest cartoons ever, don’t judge it before giving it a shot !”

“That’s it, Steven. This is the last time I pay for your dinner.”

“Well the joke’s on you love: I don’t care if you never take me out to a restaurant again, I like it as much as our take-in night-in. In fact, those are even better ‘cause I can flick bits of food at you when you’re annoying !”

Bucky’s chuckle was honest at that.

Steve gave a little squeeze at Bucky’s hand still in his and carried on. “Beside the refund policy ended, like, 75 years ago. You’re stuck with me now.”

Bucky swallowed. That was the perfect ball to catch for introducing his real goal here. “Yeah, well, about that…”

Steve’s eyes looked back to his, too blue and too clear and always with tis goddamn honesty that made Bucky swear he’d follow this reckless punk to the end of the line. And he should have been used to it now, how it stunned him every fucking time but at the moment, it was even more intense than usual.

A whole heartbeat passed before he uttered “Steve… I-“

“Here is your champagne, gentlemen”

Fuck. Bucky had totally forgotten about the waiter. He looked awkwardly at the bottle, label facing him, that the man presented to him

“Oh, er. Thank you. That… Looks good.”

Popping the cork, the waiter poured a little amount of sparkling liquid in both their rounded glasses. He didn’t place it in the crystal ice-bucket he’d brought along, instead standing still very straight by them. After a good five seconds of Bucky’s eyes darting from him to the table, and as the sniper was going to make his Winter Soldier glare, the waiter hesitantly said

 “If you’d like to take a sip of the champagne, to acknowledge it’s to your taste, Sir…”

“Oh.”

Annnnd Bucky looked like the dumbest hillbilly of the two last centuries. At least his glass hid most of his reddened face when he drank. And the perk of being in the little alcove was, he only made a fool of himself in front of the man he wanted to propose to. Great. “It’s perfect, thank you.” Romanti-what you said?

As the waiter left with a little bow, Bucky definitely caught the glint of amusement in Steve’s eyes.

“Not a fucking word Rogers. Hydra didn’t include mundane craps in my brainwashing.” He mumbled, probably looking like some kind of Grumpy Cat.

“Don’t be embarrassed Buck, I didn’t know either. There’s so many stupid rich people rules, its completely insane.”

“Yeah, but you do fine with mundane crap.”

“No I don’t. There’s always at least one thing that I do wrong and paparazzi leap on it like starving dogs on a bone.”

“ Oh yeah, I remember the 'Captain Rogers Uses Wrong Fork’ headline… People, I swear.”

The gentleness in Steve’s baby blue reminded Bucky of home, of the smell of wood in fireplace and the taste of too many sugared coffees in the morning.

“I don’t care about mundane. Most of the time, it’s just dumb arbitrary rules preventing us from being who we are.”

Bucky smirked and leaned in for a sweet, sensual kiss above the table. As it ended, he licked his lips.

“Mmnh… America would be shocked to hear that from its own sweetheart.”

“Actually that one’s from you.”

“Really?”

“Yup. I think you were trying to woo a gal with your classy rebel attitude?”

Bucky winced. “And you had to bring that up now?”

The blond laughed, “Sorry ! But I have to say, it’s still true.” Steve’s smile lessened and became more serious “Especially for us. We’ve had our fair share of liberty-deprivation.”

“You still do.” The words left Bucky’s mouth before he realized. They both knew what the sniper implied with that. Being public figures came with consequences, especially when one is a national icon. “I’m sorry, babydoll. I didn’t mean it. I know it’s not your fault but damn, it drives me mad, how they sometimes ask you to cancel Steve Rogers behind Captain America.”

“I know, Buck.” Steve’s sigh was short and a bit weary “I mean, I love helping people and I can tolerate a lot of the stuff they ask of me. But when they asked us to hide our relationship after we started dating…”

Bucky’s grimace was as sour as Steve’s voice. Not gonna lie, this forced return in the closet had pissed both of them off. The icing on the cake was when one of Fury’ subordinate had suggested to use Sharon as Steve’s beard. Bucky had promptly slammed his fist on the table. And may have broken it.

“…But they get to control less and less of my life, Buck.” The Captain carried on, “ And if they try, we’ll stand up together and say: screw you.”

Bucky raised their still tangled palms to his mouth and pressed a tender kiss on the back of Steve’s hand “Hm-hm. That’s my little punk, always ready to fight.”

Steve grinned as he lifted his index to gently stroke at Bucky’s lower lip. “Never stopped to be that guy from Brooklyn.” His blue eyes crinkled “We better hurry to choose what we’ll eat, the waiter will probably be back soon.” Picking up his menu, he hummed, “D’you think they make burgers here? It’s gonna sound offensive but I’d kill for a good burger, like Mrs Foster’s.”

That innocent sentence threw Bucky off. It was right. Exactly right. And that pinpointed why Bucky was feeling uncomfortable since they arrived here.

He looked down at the million forks and his opened menu with ridiculously expensive prices next to each dish. Some of the other customers’ voice reached faintly to him, with stilted intonations and haughty laughs.

 The flaunty mundane with obnoxious luxury and pompous shit. That was not Steve. That was not them. So yes, it might be perfect for some people, but for Steve? Bucky had stupidly based his idea on the opinion of people he didn’t even knew-scratch that, FRIDAY had included his teammates preferences. And if he could picture Tony and Pepper really enjoying themselves here, Steve? That’s not what he liked.

Oh, fuck.

_Logic lateness: 1, Bucky: 0._

He had taken the exact opposite of his previous idea, but the problem was the same: he had pushed it to its extreme.

In his pocket, the box’s ring felt heavy.

“Bucky? Everything okay?” Steve asked, sounding concerned.

The soldier shook his head “Yeah, yeah, ‘s nothing… I just-”

Suddenly, Steve’s phone rang with a shrill. Both men locked eyes: that was their alarm-tune for emergency. The Captain immediately picked up

“Natasha?”

“I’m sorry to cut your date short, but we need both of you right now ! MODOK have sent a batallion of cyber warriors in Central Park and- Tony, watch out !”

_Lucky-star-I-had-stopped-believing-in, are you trying to make amend for sleeping these 75 last years? Cause it’s working._

“On our way” Steve immediately said, slipping in his Avenger’s leader role. He took his jacket back as he ended the call and shot Bucky a sorry look “ I’m sorry, I know you worked really hard for this-”

“Don’t be. After we kick these bastard’s ass, wanna get that burger?”

Steve nodded in agreement, but his eyes didn’t crinkle like they usually would, and Bucky knew he was already letting Captain America take the driving seat off Steve Rogers. The sniper slapped a banknote on their table to cover the almost untouched bottle and both men made their way out of the restaurant. Luckily thanks to the serum, they could both run at top speed and make it to Central Park in around 12 minutes. Hopefully it wouldn’t be too late.

As Bucky’s metal arm recalibrated, the soldier cursed under his breath. He literally had his weapon at arm’s reach, but Steve hadn’t taken his shield, and Bucky knew him well enough to not even bother asking if he had brought a gun. They’d have to fight in their civilian clothes, too, so Steve would be totally exposed and defenseless, except for the serum. Fuck.

As they sprinted closer to Central Park, the sound of fight became clearer.

Natasha hadn’t exaggerated. They truly faced a battalion. At least forty massive, taller than human soldiers were attacking. Their alloy-covered body smashing everything they came in contact with.

“Guys!” Sam yelled, flying while shooting two goons at once, “We can’t let them get out of here, they’ll target civilians!”

They didn’t have time to acknowledge Sam as two enemies surged to them. Bucky fended them off, sheltering Steve as best he could. His right hand quickly rummaged in his pocket, extricating a little Smith & Wesson he’d thankfully armed himself with. Promptly, he shot his opponent and smashed its face with his metal arm for good measure.

Of course when he turned back, Steve was already gone, merging seamlessly into the battle. With no armor or weapons.

“God dammit, Steve !”

Fighting came with adrenaline. Concern for Steve doubled the rush.

Bucky knew his lover could fight on his own. But the punk was reckless enough with his suit and shield on, so without?  Alright. The Winter Soldier would have to multitask.

Taking cyber warrior after cyber warrior down before they leapt out of the park was complicated, especially with how out-numbered the Avengers were. Doing it while making sure Steve was okay and interfere when the situation became too much for his boyfriend was very, very complicated. Doing so without said boyfriend noticing and so, without him yelling in outrage, was downright impossible.

“For Christ sake, Buck!” The Captain yelled as the goon he was fighting crumbled, not-so mysteriously shot.

The sniper, a few meters apart, rolled his eyes. He would have shrugged if he wasn’t busy pummelling two warriors at once. Suddenly, the Soldier saw Steve stampeding and smashing his elbow on the side of one enemies’ skull, right on the soft patch of the temple hidden behind the alloy helmet.

“Don’t ‘Buck’ me, Rogers” he immediately retorted, avoiding a whack from the remaining warrior, “I just make sure someone have your back. Team work.”

Steve rushed to his side, jumping and lending feet first on Bucky’s assailant, effectively knocking him out and hitting him with his fist. The Captain grinned

“Partner in the battlefield and in life, uh? Well thanks, love.”

At that, Bucky’s heart throbbed with desire. If pet names easily flowed from his own mouth, Steve rarely used them. Not because he loved the other man any less, but given Bucky’s flirting tendency back in the forties and Steve total lack of, the leader of the Avengers hadn’t the sniper’s practised ease. So the rare times he did use one, longing flood in Bucky’s veins. He pulled Steve in by the nape of his neck and landed a kiss right on Steve’s face. The Captain immediately complied, opening his mouth to deepen the kiss.

“Damn I love you” he breathed on the Soldier’s lips.

Adrenalin still pulsed in his blood, now mixed with his eternal desire for Steve. And suddenly, it was obvious. _This_ , this was them. Not the luxurious, snobby shit. Loving the hell of each other during battle? That was more like it. Plus, kissing on top of a pile of dead enemies summed their history pretty well. This was his perfect moment.

He pulled on his soon-to-be-fiancé’s lip as he withdrew, “You know what? You’re right. We’re both partners in the battlefield and in life. You’re my best friend, my backbone, my rock, the one who saved me every time I was close to death, the love of my fucking life and I can’t imagine spending it without you. I never could, not even when we were just two kids from Brooklyn. I want you to allow me to spend my lifetime by your side, loving you and protecting you and trying to give you as much as you give me every day. So Steve Grant Rogers…”

A loud crack rang out, then Bucky promptly dropped on his knee. But not like he intended to.

“Fuck!” he grunted, bending as pain cut behind his patella. Blood spurted alarmingly.

He heard gun firing followed by Nat’s voice, “I took care of the coward bastard that shot Bucky, how is he?”

“Ahh well, I didn’t know someone could bleed out from the knee, but if I had to take a guess it would be his popliteal artery, and he needs to go to the hospital.” Steve shouted back, surrounding the wound with both hands to stop the haemorrhage.

The soldier’s palate felt mushy and tight. He could feel cold sweat damping his forehead. His shitty version of the serum didn’t heal him as fast as Steve. His time as the Winter Soldier had him know he’ll soon grow unconscious. Above him, Steve’s voice was already slightly dizzy to his ears.

_Fuck you, lucky-star. You’re an eternal disappointment._

**** 

After the Grands Fails 2 and 3, as Bucky had inwardly taken to calling them, Bucky was seriously starting to believe he was maybe cursed in the marriage department. Which really annoyed him. It was like some superior entity was pointing at him with their index finger and having a big old laugh at his expense. The Soldier had even asked Thor if his pain in the arse of a brother was back decided to take up a day hobby of fucking with Bucky’s love life.

Long story short: he was getting more and more frustrated with his lack of being engaged. A frustrated Bucky meant a grumpy Bucky. An increasingly grumpier Bucky meant an increasingly prying Steve, which was the last thing Bucky needed. Steve hadn’t found the ring in Bucky’s pocket when the latter had been rushed to the hospital - thanks to Natasha - so the cat wasn’t out of the bag - yet -, but Bucky knew he wouldn’t always get away with hazardous pirouettes.

He was desperately trying to find an approach that would fucking work. Destiel, constantly mewling in his lap, wasn’t helping. The sniper pinched the bridge of his nose, forcing himself to calm down. Hell, proposing wasn’t supposed to be more difficult than taking down a HYDRA base! Every damn time an idea finally popped in his head, he immediately scratched it with an inner grunt, finding a flaw that could lead to the Grand Fail #4 he absolutely refused to endure.

He caught a small black paw swiping at his jaw and Bucky, by instinct, threw the assailant off. His cat meowed indignantly. The sniper sighed and leaned to get the pet back on his knees, where he resumed his playing with Bucky’s long strands.

  
“Sorry buddy,” he apologised with an affectionate pat on his little furry head, “Daddy is stuck with some fussy shit.”

“So why doesn’t he talk about it with Other Daddy?”

Bucky cursed under his breath. Fuck. He hadn’t heard Steve coming. And since when did his life turned into a damn rom-com?!

_Stupid cliché : 1, Bucky: 0._

“ ‘Cause that’s nothing to get worried about, punk.” He said, using the palm that wasn’t currently petting Des to make grabby hand at his boyfriend. Steve sat next to him but didn’t lose his concerned look. “Then why does it bother you?”

“I swear, everything’s fine, babydoll.” Bucky pulled the Captain’s wrist to his mouth and planted a kiss there. “Just paperwork and administrative stuff. You know if it was something bad, I’ll tell you.”

Steve’s eyes remained suspicious, searching Bucky’s face for a lie. Eventually, the blond carefully said “Alright, then…”

Bucky didn’t miss the hurt in the clear blue gaze. His heart clenched tightly. “Hey. C’mere, punk.” As Steve snuggled to his side, Bucky pressed a peck to his lover’s temple. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

Steve’s stomach grumbled, cutting the moment

“You hungry?”

The Captain shrugged.  “A bit. Don’t wanna cook, tho.”

“ Just because you’re a lazy doesn’t mean you have to starve to death.”

“Mh.” Steve idly stroked the cat now resting on both their laps. “Cook for me?”

Bucky considered. He _could_ , but he really didn’t felt like cooking. “Nah, you just infected me with your laziness.”

One blond eyebrow arched “So now it’s my fault?”

“Didn’t said that either. We’re two very old men is all. But because I’m an amazing boyfriend, I can make us sandwiches.”

Steve pouted “ You already had that for lunch yesterday and the day before."

“So what?”

“So I happen to care about your health, dumbass. No, no sandwiches.”

“Then go make dinner yourself, I don’t feel like doing anything more complicated that stuffing two slices of bread.”

“But the kitchen is so far,” Steve whined - a sound that no 240 pound beefcake should ever make. He even gave Bucky the Famous Rogers Puppy Eyes. Fuck.

“You’re a menace,” the sniper huffed, “Thai take out? I’ll take the chicken salad.”

Steve chuckled “See, a compromise.”

“Nya nya nya. You’re lucky I love you.”

Bucky wasn’t prepared for the tenderness in Steve’s beaming face when the Captain softly said _I am_. The soldier’s hear fluttered bit.

He had to marry this man. And gives him the perfect proposal he deserved.

Unfortunately, it appeared the world was conspiring against him. The following day, Steve got called away for a mission in Colombia with Sam and Clint. For two weeks. How was he supposed to propose if his future husband wasn’t there?

Bucky wanted to bang his head against the wall.

Furthermore, Steve didn’t sleep as well without Bucky spooning him, and Bucky wasn’t much better. (Clint might have made a joke about co-dependency once and found himself with a blade tucked next to his ear). Which explains how he found himself sitting on the rooftop of the Avengers Tower at three in the morning with a bottle of vodka loose in his grip.

There was something beautiful with the sight of such a big city in the early hours. The lights were never all out. Even in its darkest blocks, you could always find a dozen lights, tiny little dots like valiant fireflies standing out of the shadowy silhouette of big buildings. Bucky took a sip directly from the bottle.

The sound of something landing loudly behind him startled him. Immediately, the sniper turned around, and in one graceful move had his butterfly knife out and pricking the neck of the assailant. Only to find himself face to face with…

“Well, well! If it’s not the second hottest World War Two veteran in the world! Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just _really_ happy to see me? How ya been, Buck?”

Bucky didn’t know how Wade managed to make the mask convey he was wigging his brows with a suggestive look.

“Wade?” The sniper asked, dumbfounded. He withdrew his weapon and swiftly tucked it back inside his jacket.

Wade wolf-whistled, “That’s way too hot when you do that, I understand why Steve leapt on you. I wouldn’t have pegged him for the bad-boy liking type but-“

“What are you doing here?” Bucky said while sitting back where he was. It’s not that he didn’t liked Wade, the guy could be really fun but… sometimes, Wade was just… weird.

Deadpool made an abstract gesture with his hands. “I was with Spidey- you know, the teen with a costume that looks a lot like me? Well actually, it’d be more correct to say my design looks a lot like his ‘cause technically he was there first- but anyway, I was with Peter, just hanging out together quiet literally, y’know with his webs ‘n all. So I was trying to explain why we should be fuck buddies but he kept yelling no and he was blushing adorably-”

“Wait, you’re hitting on a teen ?!”

“-so I kept teasing him with that but I might have pissed him off a bit too much when I started singing A Whole New World, so he dropped me here. I love this guy.”

Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed “Wade…”

“What? Can’t a man flirt ?”

“He’s a kid !”

“Not in every version ! Plus it’s canon that he’s my heartmate!”

And that… was very confusing

“Not in… what the hell?”

The Merc with a mouth casually dismissed with a sweep of his hand “ Don’t worry your pretty head with that so much, we didn’t do anything, I’m not a rapist and Peter isn’t interested. Yet.” He plopped himself next to Bucky “ And what are you doing here so early? Is Cap snoring?”

“Tony is gonna murder your arse for that one  and I’m not sure I’ll stop him. No, Steve’s on a mission at the moment. Tried to sleep but had insomnia so I came here to have a passionate affair with Miss Moskovskaya” he said nonchalantly, raising the bottle a bit before offering it to Wade.

Deadpool took a mouthful before asking, “Something’s on your mind, lately?”

The sniper shrugged. “Nothing.”

Wade poked him on the cheek. “Come onnnn! Stevie never told you it helps to let it all out or something? Tell me, what’s on your mind, pal?

In normal times, Bucky would have eyed him critically: he liked Wade but damn, was the dude weird sometimes. And not well known for his subtlety. The last thing he needed was Steve finding out because Wade had posted an InStarkGram comment or something. But Bucky was also weary and growing more and more pissed of his successive fails, so he relented.  
“Promise me this doesn’t leave this rooftop.”

Wade held one hand up, palm-opened, like a parody of scout-vow, “There, I promise; I’d even sew my mouth shut but last time it happened, fans lost their shit. Gotta admit this movie version was really pathetic, huh.”

Bucky arched an eyebrow. “What the… you know what, forget it.” He sighed, looking blankly in front of him.  
  
            “I want to propose to Steve,” he mumbled.

The little white spaces covering Wade’s eyes widened and he encased his latex-covered cheeks with his hands, like he was in awe. “Seriously?! You and Cap are gonna get married? That’s freaking awesome! Please, please you haffta let me be the bridesmaid, pleaaaase!”

“The thing is” Bucky carried on, knowingly ignoring the interruption, “It’s like there’s a goddamn curse over my head, what with every time I try to propose, some shit happens and it’s a huge fail. I want it to be perfect for Steve and every goddamn time I think : this is it, that’s the perfect moment, I realize something wrong or I’m interrupted and then it’s back to square one.”

“That’s tough, man” Wade conceded. “Maybe you could… I don’t know, erm… Oh yeah, Paris! You take him to Paris, bang him at the peak of the Eiffel Tower, feed him croissants afterward then drop to your knees still naked, say: Stevie, marry me like one of your French Girls, and since you’re already there, you suck him off to make an happier end. Oh, wait. No forget, it. The author already used the Paris trope in another story, that would look warmed over. Fuck. Erm… Hey, you know what would be a perfect time for that? During sex!”

Bucky honestly wanted to face-palm. Instead, he closed his eyes in annoyance and pressed his finger to his temples. “Wade, I know you want to help and even though Steve’s certainly not the pure virgin everybody think he is, he’s not a sex-driven dud like you.”

“No no no wait, listen, I’m being serious man. Sex is the most perfect thing, right? Or as long as you know how to fuck but I’m sure you’re a sex God so yeah. So obviously, that makes a perfect time.” Deadpool raised a finger rhetorically. “As for the practical side, that’ll be just the two of you for a while, except you want a threesome or an orgy, which, by the way, _call me_.”

The metal arm recalibrated itself automatically like even Bucky’s body wanted to punch the other man. The sniper put his head between his hands and groaned in exasperation “You’re even worse than Tony sometimes, and that’s not easy-”

“C’mon man, let me make my point: you won’t be disturbed, or at least you have less chance to be. That’s a perfect context of intimacy that you know how to handle so you won’t go all feral and alarmed like a distressed damsel, so another point for The Merc-”

Bucky perked up. That… actually made sense, Bucky had to admit. Could be tender without being cheesy. He just had to make sure Steve had one of the best orgasm of his life, and Bucky was pretty good at that, his babydoll always so ravenous for their lovemaking and kinky scenes-

“- And that seriously offers so many fucking possibilities, both literally and figuratively, like you could write Marry Me on your skin with his jizz, or you could blindfold him and use the ring as a cock ring on him, oh my God I’m a genius I’m gonna put that one away for myself.”

“You’re such a weirdo sometimes, Wade.”

****

The week following Wade’s weird-but-actually-not-that-dumb-advice, Bucky is granted the opportunity to execute said advice. Not before, because both super soldiers had been drowned in work - people to save, bad guys to kick, guns to unload et cetera. They had been too tired to do anything more than lazy handjobs or the occasional quick blowjob in the shower. Not nearly enough to set a good, mind-blowing scene for his baby.

Fortunately, their schedule seemed to became a bit less gruelling on the weekend; Bucky only had to supervise some SHIELD newbies’s training (including that Peter boy, which had earned him a warning from Tony. Tss, Bucky was perfectly capable of not breaking someone’s arm when he didn’t want to, Stark!) in the morning, while Steve only had a lunchtime meeting with Natasha and Sam. And Sunday was only dedicated to some paperwork they totally could do from home, so it granted them time to recover from a hopefully blissful and exhausting sex session plus time to celebrate their engagement.

The former assassin had been itching the whole morning, and had looked forward to the end of the training session just as much as the recruits he’d been in charge of. The same anticipation buzzed in his whole system as he found himself power walking back to his and Steve’s floor. Not because of sex- okay, not _only_ because of the sex, but then again sex with Steve was always pretty incredible- but mainly because of what the sex was leading to, this special time. The ring was safely hidden in the false bottom of his bedside table’s drawer, so he wouldn’t even have to untangle from Steve to get it.

He hadn’t made his mind yet on whether he’d be popping the question during the act itself- the absolute best would be just before he makes Steve come- or after, during their post-coital cuddles. He didn’t want to plan everything, because he knew that he’d eventually go with the flow. Concentrating too much on the proposing during this particular time could end up some nasty mishap, like a flaccid prick.

As he entered- ok, more like threw himself- in their flat, he saw Steve reading peacefully on the couch. The blond’s head perked up to him and Bucky was welcomed with a bright smile.  
 “Hey Buck”.

Bucky crossed the distance between them and kissed his boyfriend like a starved man, tongue and lips ravenous, and Steve happily kissed back. He only retreated when both men were out of their breath. “Hello babe.”

Steve chuckled, “That was a hell of a hello.” Still grinning, the Captain stroked at Bucky’s cheekbone, up to his skull that he gently scratched. Bucky almost purred.

“Well I’ve had the feeling that I somehow neglected my wonderful boyfriend lately,” Bucky sing-songed. He took the wrist of the hand in his hair and gently lowered it to lick at the blond’s middle finger without breaking eye contact. Steve’s eyes darkened with lust. “I missed you, babydoll…”

“Missed you too,” Steve looked like he wanted to add something, but closed his mouth. Not unnoticed by Bucky.

If something was troubling his partner, sex would have to wait. “Hey, Stevie.” He asked very softly while cradling the blond’s head in his palms, changing the mood from sexy to another form of intimate. “What’s on your mind?” Steve didn’t answer, as if hesitating. Bucky repeated “Stevie? What’s bothering you?”

“… You tell me.” Bucky’s eyebrows scrunched, not understanding. Steve sighed, but didn’t move away. “It just… feels like something’s on YOUR mind lately. You look thoughtful a lot of time.” One of the Captain’s hand snuck to caress the sniper’s flesh wrist.

 _Shit_ , Bucky thought. Fortunately, he had enough training to school his features into not looking any different. “I’ve just been antsy lately ‘cause I couldn’t spend as much time as I’d like with you. This week has been pretty booked…”

“But it’s not just this week,” Steve bit his lips as soon as the words escaped him. Finally, he added “ Is it your nightmares? If they’re coming back, we can ask your therapist. Whatever it is, you know you can talk to me? I know I most likely won’t be able to change it but you know I’m always willing to help you, any way I can…”

Once again, Bucky mentally cursed. _Universe deciding to be a huge troll: 1, Bucky: 0._

“Steve, listen,” he said, looking straight into his lover’s eyes to prove his sincerity. “I swear to you, nothing troublesome is bothering me.”

“So there is something troubling you.”

 _Universe deciding to be a huge troll: 2, Bucky: 0_.

Dammit. “ Steve, you know I always think a lot. About a lot of things. But I swear to you on my mother’s grave, it’s nothing bad. It’s not torturing me or making me feel depressed. If it was, I’d tell you the minute it happened.” At Steve’s disillusioned rising eyebrow, Bucky corrected “Okay, maybe not right away but I would tell you.”

Steve scrutinised Bucky’s face, before relenting with a peck “Fine…” he murmured against the sniper’s mouth.

As they parted, Bucky found himself asking, “So… do you still want to go to the bedroom?” Sex and proposing could wait. If Steve wasn’t in the mood anymore, they’d just cuddle and talk about their days, or they could go out if Steve wanted, but Bucky didn’t want to do this if his lover didn’t really want  it either.

Fortunately, Steve grinned with mischief and his index lightly tug at the collar of Bucky’s shirt, “Well we maybe have been neglecting our relationship lately…” The blond drew him in a languid kiss.

 _Universe deciding to be a huge troll:2, Bucky: 1._ Take that, asshole.

“ What do you want then, Stevie? Top, bottom? Love making or kinky stuff?” Bucky wiggled his eyebrows to lighten the mood.

Though Bucky knew his lover pretty well by now- at least about the bottom/top part, because their desire to either do a scene or make love varied pretty much- they had made huge progress in communication since their first time. And though they didn’t always talk like that when they had sex, they always did before engaging in a scene, to make sure they wanted everything that would follow.

So he wasn’t surprised when Steve elected to bottom. They didn’t switch a lot, Steve generally preferring to be penetrated. Then, with a coy, shy-schoolboy-like voice, the blond continued “ And I’d like to scene… Sir.”

“Very well, babydoll.” The same applied to their BDSM relationship, Bucky always being the Dom and enjoying taking care and control of his lover, while Steve enjoyed being the Sub and finally being able to not think, not having to make the decisions for once. Slipping in the right mindset, Bucky pecked Steve on the lips, “And I’m pleased you called me Sir right at the start, like a good boy.” The sniper saw Steve’s eyes flutter while he took a sharp intake of breath. Steve had always liked to be praised…

Bucky’s eyes checked quickly at Destiel’s favorite spots and saw the tabby sleeping in his hammock. Good. Cat in the room when they were fucking was _not_ a turn-on.

“We’re gonna go to our room,” Bucky said while rising to his feet, “And you’re gonna sit on the bed, back against the headboard. Then I’ll pick some things for us to start with and if there’s anything that you don’t like, you tell me. Understood?”

“Yes, Sir.” Steve said, licking his lips and making them alluringly pink and wet.

“What’s your safewords, babydoll?”

“Red to stop, yellow to slow down. Green to go.”

“That’s my babydoll. So good…” Bucky’s dick gave an interested twitch at Steve low whine. “Now, let’s go.”

Bucky couldn’t help a smile at his lover’s hurry. So eager to please, the Bucky’s Dom brain thought fondly.

Once in their safely locked room, Bucky went to their “playbox” as he liked to call it, his back to Steve to block his view. He hummed at the drawer’s content. First, he picked leather padded handcuffs. Steve loved to be tied up, and though the Captain could easily rip such fragile bonds, half the fun was to see Bucky’s baby writing and trying to control himself, to be Bucky’s good boy. Next followed a thick length of black silk and a leather cock-ring. Bucky took his time to choose, wanting to build anticipation for Steve. He could already catch the blond’s ragged breath from their bed. Was Steve already hard? The idea threw another pulse of arousal in Bucky’s own cock.

With the same deliberate slowness, Bucky delicately picked the chain of a pair of nipple clamps. Steve was so sensitive on this part of his body, but they had used the clamps frequently and Bucky wanted to surprise his lover, so he categorised it as a “maybe”. He could feel Steve’s eyes burning at his back, probably dying of impatience. Bucky wandered if his partner would throw a sassy remark intended to rile him up and make him go faster. That had happened often enough. But no, Steve seemed to really want to be pliant and please him tonight.

Bucky’s eyes caught a silver of another toy half hidden under the crop. The soldier took it to run a metal finger on the curve of the purple vibrator. The movement made a bottle of tingling and warming lube roll over. Plan slowly coming to his mind, Bucky grinned and snatched it too, before turning back to Steve.

The Captain was staring at him, bottom lip bitten red and cheeks flushed. “Sir…” he purred, spreading his legs invitingly.

Without breaking eye contact, Bucky joined him on the bed and straddled his lover’s thick thighs, his interested dick brushing Steve’s half hard erection through their clothes. He dropped his selection on the mattress behind him. “Eyes on me babydoll. Don’t try to sneak a peak.”

Holding the cerulean gaze, Bucky slowly leaned forward. If he was about to take Steve apart, he’d do it meticulously. The blond must have taken his gesture for an incoming kiss, eyes fluttering shut and head tilting, lips slightly parted. How could Bucky resist such invitation? He gave Steve what he asked for. But Bucky was aiming to tease, to rile up, and so he kept the kiss barely a brush of mouth, more hot breath hitting the other’s face than actual contact, while his fingers started to trace the edge of the blond’s shirt.

Bucky leisurely followed the outline of fabric, careful to not touch actual skin, down to the first button. His finger pads went to the round little clasp and once again, traced its outline. Under him, Steve’s chest was heaving. He could feel the blond’s breath growing erratic between his parted lips.

            “Ah…” A sigh escaped Steve “Bu-Sir…”

            “Ssh…”

But because he wasn’t a complete sadist, Bucky gently licked at his lover’s lips. Steve groaned and his body clenched under Bucky’s. Okay, that was more cruel than Bucky first thought. Really wanting to soothe him, Bucky finally popped the first button, revealing the delicious skin of Steve’s clavicles. The soldier led both of their bodies to lie on the bed, still stranding Steve’s muscled thighs,  and attached his mouth on a spot just above the collarbone in a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss. He intended to leave a mark as his fingers kept on their downward adventure to expose more of Steve; said man threw both arms around Bucky with a moan, one eager palm trailing up the former assassin’s shirt while the other pressed on the Dom’s back to bring their bodies closer.

Once he finished opening Steve’s frankly offensive shirt and figuring the love bite on his neck would be sufficient, Bucky retracted, making his lover complain at the loss. He was satisfied to see a deeply burgundy spot on Steve’s creamy neck. He took at the blond’s wrists, gentle but firm, and put them above the Captain’s head.

            “Babydoll… Did I said you could touch me yet?”

            “ I’m sorry, Sir ! But… You didn’t said I could not _not_ touch you either.”

Bucky hummed at the sass, “Mmh… Well lucky for you, I know exactly how to prevent you from misbehaving again. ‘Cause I know you don’t really want to misbehave, do you, Stevie?”

“No, Sir. I want to be good.”

Bucky smirked, “Oh, I know. And I got just what you need to do that.” Without looking away from the gorgeous man close to him, the sniper let go of one of his wrist to reach behind and blindly caught the handcuffs. He let them dangle a few inches from his lover’s face and was pleased with Steve’s sharp intake of breath “I’m gonna handcuff you. Are you okay with that?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good.” He carefully set down the restraints on Steve’s bare abs. The shock of cool metal on Steve’s overheated skin made the muscles there quiver, and Bucky had to stop himself from tracing the muscles with his tongue. Steve let out a huff of air heavy with desire. “Then I want to put this-” Bucky slowly brung the cock-ring to his partner’s view, rolling it between his thumb and pointer before he rolled it on the skin of Steve’s chest, “-on your gorgeous cock. And finally,” the Dom picked up the silky length of fabric and trailed it lightly over Steve’s face, caressing his cheekbones, his eyelids, his tempting mouth, “I want to blindfold you, so you can feel everything I’m about to do to you more intensely.”

 _And make a bigger surprise when I reveal the ring to you_ /

“Then I’m going to tease you and delay your orgasm until I finally let you come. You won’t see what will bring you pleasure or where.” Picking the vibrator, he teased the bulbous head at Steve’s lips and with a breathy sound, the Captain parted his mouth; but Bucky never breached past his lips. “Will I use this? And when? Will I push it in your tight little hole or make you suck it in that pretty, wet mouth? Or maybe I’ll rub it all along your straining dick?” Steve’s hips gave an uncontrolled twitch and he moaned; Bucky licked his lips, aroused. “Or maybe,” he snatched the clamps up and let it dangle on Steve’s heaving pecs, “I’ll use this little thing on your gorgeous tits?”

He let one end of the silver device lightly catch on one of Steve’s nipples, and the blond honest to God wailed; Bucky repressed a shudder.

 “I know how much you love when I play with these. I love it, too. Or maybe,” He dropped the toy on Steve’s skin and leaned, nipping at his lover’s earlobe, “I won’t use any of these? There’s so many things I could use to play with you… And you wouldn’t know what or when. You’ll just lie here, shuddering and trembling and taking it like a good boy.”

 Steve threw his head back, exposing the delicious column of his neck and showing off Bucky’s previous handywork. “I promise that whatever I do, it’ll respect your limits. And you can stop any moment you want. But if you don’t want to, I’ll find another way to make you come.”

“I want this,” Steve whimpered, cheeks red and eyes already glazed over. Bucky could feel his lover’s prick now stiff under him. “I want this so much- Sir, please, please-”

Bucky kissed him on the mouth. Hard. He was just as excited as his partner. Steve was so beautiful, Bucky couldn’t wait to make his babydoll thrash and turn and moan in pleasure-

With all the self-control he could muster, the former assassin broke the kiss, both men panting. “I love you, Stevie.”

“I love you too.”

Bucky carefully put the handcuffs on each of his submissive wrists, before linking each metallic end to their headboard. The one with the slats they got for this very reason. Once checking it wasn’t too tight, he moved on to the blindfold. Steve closed his eyes before the smooth length was put on him and Bucky couldn’t help but press a reverent kiss on each pale eyelid.

He then let his hands roam on the expanse of the bound’s man chest, using the opportunity to drop all the stuff he had left on Steve’s body beside them. Steve abs clenched at each teasing passing of Bucky’s finger on his bare skin.

Bucky started to play with the zip of his boyfriend’s pants. This little game didn’t last long though; he was impatient and just as hungry for it that his partner, and soon, the jeans were removed. Steve huffed a relieved sigh as his cock was finally released from its tight confines, yet still held down by his underwear.

Bucky pressed the heel of his flesh hand to the fabric of Steve’s boxers and rubbed longing circles. Steve gasped and moaned.

Bucky only stopped to hook his pointers under the fabric and drag it away; Steve canting his hips without having to be asked. “Good boy.”

Bucky took a dollop of their regular lube and resumed his ministrations directly on the hot flesh of his lover’s cock until he was fully hard. He jerked Steve off with casual, long flicks of his wrist. Without any constant pace, his thumb would follow the long vein on the underside or dip in the slit at random. The blond’s shudders and low groans at each surprise touch made a grin creep on Bucky’s face. The blindfold was definitively a good idea.

             “You like that? Not knowing what I’ll do to you?” An upward stroke with a turn on the head. “Does it enhance your other senses? Do you feel it more than usual when I do _this_?” A mean little flick on the cockhead. Steve’s hiss sounded half pain, half pleasure. One of Bucky’s fingertip collected a bead of pre-come that was bubbling out of the tip. “What about the sound? Do you pay more attention to the slick sound of my hand on your dick? Because doll, you’re already so wet, barely even need this lube…” Steve gasped and Bucky saw him tug uncontrollably on his bounding. “Ah ah. Careful love, don’t want to break the handcuffs.”

            “Ah.. Sorry, Sir… Just, please… More, Sir…”

            Bucky smirked fondly, “How can I say no to that?” He reached for the tingling lube this time, and coated three fingers in a generous amount.

He took his time opening his lover up, inserting one digit at a time, scissoring and crooking them. Bucky avoided the blond’s prostate as much as possible so he could brush by it when Steve expected it the least. The bound man writhed beautifully under him, and Bucky’s throat was dry with each erotic twist of Steve’s body. For someone so broad and muscled, he could move his body like the most graceful of dancers.

“You’re doing so good, dollface, so pretty…” Without stopping his work inside, Bucky leaned forward, careful not to touch Steve. It had him bending in a weird angle, but that was totally worth the cry of utter surprise it got him when he took the Captain in his mouth. Bucky suckled before letting go with a light pop, “Stay still, babydoll. If you move too much, I’ll stop and you’ll be punished.”

For the next ten minutes, Bucky took Steve apart from both sides, with sudden strokes on his prostate alternating with unexpected licks on his cock. Bucky saw how progressively his lover’s body grew desperate, movements less and less controlled the longer his body was assaulted with unforeseen jolt of pleasure. The constant string of noises Steve let grew urgent and jerky, each breathy whine and mewling moan sending arousal in the sniper’s dick. His rounded asscheeks clenched rhythmically, sensation shooting from his sweet spot and the tingling on his walls provided by the lube. Bucky knew Steve was about to lose it, and soon.

Good. That was what the sniper wanted.

And indeed, Steve’s groin arched sharply as Bucky had taken him back in his mouth, chasing pleasure and the back of Bucky’s throat. The Dom pulled away and tutted, mischief distinct along feigned disappointment.

            “Stevie, what did I said about moving?”

            “To- not to, Sir, I’m sorry, Sir, b-but-”

            “No ‘but’,” he withdrew his fingers as well, taking all of his partner’s pleasure away.

At Steve’s indignant noise, Bucky slapped him on the thigh. “You know there’d be consequences if you misbehave, so don’t act all bratty now.”

            “I won’t, Sir. I didn’t want to. It just- it felt so good…”

“You weren’t about to come without permission, were you? Not when I specifically told you we were to play with orgasm delay?”

Bucky already knew the answer- after all, that had been his goal all along- but Steve’s silence was telling. The soldier was sure his lover could hear the smirk in his voice as he tutted. “What am I gonna do with you if you misbehave like this?”

“I didn’t want to ! You did it on purpose-“

Bucky landed another slap on Steve’s thigh, cutting his Sub’s outburst short. “Yes, I did. I thought you didn’t want to be a brat, yet you’re still arguing with me. Keep up the attitude and you won’t be coming at all. Do I need to really punish you or will you go back to being my good babydoll?”

Steve body language screamed submission, probably embarrassed, and Bucky immediately knew didn’t want real punishment for this scene.

 “No, Sir, I’ll be good. I’m sorry, Sir.”

“No need to apologise, love,” the sniper pressed a quick kiss on Steve’s navel, “But you still need something to help you remember our aim today. Can you tell me what it is?”

“To wait to come.”

“Good. What’s your colour?”

“Green, Sir.”

Bucky shuffled to get the cock ring. He was glad for the blindfold, as it hid his grimace when he thought back about what Wade had said about using the engagement ring for. He really didn’t wanted to think about Wade right now. Also, Wade was sleeping with some really underwhelming dick if he could use a normal ring as a cock ring

He snapped the device in place on Steve, then picked up the vibrator. With all of Steve’s fidgeting, it was a wonder nothing had toppled off on the ground. Picking up tingling lube again, he lathered the toy and teased at his lover’s entrance. He let the bulbous head kiss at his boyfriend’s rim and draw away, rub enticingly without breaching, trailing a bit lower to press at the perineum, and start it all over again. Steve tried to push backward, undulating with desire and distress. Bucky chuckled. He wasn’t going to lie, after all the fails due to the situations slipping out of his hands, having control like that was exhilarating.

            “Well, Stevie?” Bucky couldn’t help but taunted “ What’s the matter?”

            “Bu-Sir, please…!”

            “Please what, doll? Can’t give you anything if I don’t know what you want.”

             “Please use the vibrator on me!”

            “But that’s exactly what I’m doing, love,” The Dom said, pressing against the furled opening without penetrating. He totally knew he was being an asshole, but he also knew Steve totally get off on that. “Or do you mean something else?”

            Steve’s voice was high with frustration and want, head thumping on his pillow and baring his throat. “Fuck me! Please, fuck me with the vibrator, put it in me and turn it on, please, Sir, please !”

            “All you had to do was ask.” He pushed all of the toy to the hilt in one smooth glide and turned it on the lowest setting. Steve’s back arched, offering himself to the pleasure like a new Ganymede offering his body to the claws of Zeus, ready and willing to be taken.

And Steve was definitely ready and willing to be taken.

The blond man thrashed on the bed as Bucky moved the vibrator in and out of him, aiming for his prostate with his sniper precision. There was something hypnotising in the way the Steve’s hips rose and fell, like the bound man couldn’t help it - and Bucky knew Steve couldn’t help it. And yet, each jerk and twist hold a sinuous grace like moves from a dancer. Was it because it was Steve and Bucky was utterly in love with him thus blinded by his constant desire for the other man? An inherence of the serum? Or simply because Steve always had a bit of perfectness - always had had, even when he was a scrawny punk from Brooklyn - that the blond himself had never acknowledge?

And the high-pitched gasps and breathless groans that poured from red-bitten lips, they were so tempting, filling Bucky’s soul with and a needy hunger and reward. Steve held as much power, actually even more, than Bucky at this instant. Because as much as Steve was Bucky’s sub, Bucky was a slave to Steve, eager to worship at his altar.

            “Buck-Sir… Please… I want-“

            “Not yet, baby.”

To make up for his lover’s anguished whine, Bucky took his cock back in his mouth and sucked hard. Steve cried out as his hips stuttered. Bucky’s gaze never let Steve’s face, even if the blindfold prevented him to be looked back. Steve was beautiful.

Another pang of arousal shot through his core. Not able to take it anymore, he let go of Steve’s dick for a second and with his free hand, haphazardly tugged his pants and underwear off. His cock was hard and red, pre-come gathering on the tip. A relieved curse escaped the Dom’s mouth, and he threw his shirt somewhere. He saw Steve shudder. Had he understood Bucky was getting naked, too?

            “I want you to blow me while I blow you, dollface,” he growled, voice strained with lust, “You okay with that?”

            “Yes,” Steve panted “Yes, please Sir, do that !”

            “ If it get too much or you want to stop, you-”

            “Snap my fingers twice,” Steve cut in while doing exactly that “I know, please Sir, hurry!”

            Bucky chuckled as he carefully straddled his lover, facing his lower half. “Eager, aren’t you, baby?”

            Steve let a choked laugh “For you? Ravenous, Sir.”

Sexual and emotional desire blossomed in Bucky’s guts. He leant down to suck his lover’s cock while gently pressing at his perineum with a finger. The bound man doubled his sounds and wriggling, but after a few seconds, he engulfed Bucky like he’d die if he didn’t. The man on top moaned at that, the vibrations no doubt stimulating his partner even more. Putting his mind to bringing Steve to another near orgasm, Bucky used all the tricks he knew. He sucked and licked and bobbed his head, wicked tongue playing with the tip and throat tightening around the length. He gave as much as he got.

 

Bucky knew Steve enough to notice when the man was close to climax. His partner would have already come once before their little sixty-nine if it wasn’t for the snug ring around his dick, and another delayed orgasm was happily making its way toward the blond.

Perfect.

Bucky felt his own release coming and, wanting to save it for when he would be inside his lover, mustered all the will he had to force himself to pull out of Steve’s hot and wet mouth. Steve whined at that- and probably at the loss of Bucky’s mouth around his own dick, too.

“ No, Steve,” his tone was more ragged that he thought, “not yet.”

Another whine of frustration when Bucky got up off the bed. Steve must have felt the dip.

“Shh, shh,” Bucky quickly soothed him and pecked him on the lips, “I’m just gonna grab something. Won’t be too long. You okay with that?”

“Yes, Sir,” Steve’s voice was as worn out of Bucky’s.

“Good. If anything feel wrong, yell for me. And you know you can break out of the handcuffs with no efforts.”

“I know, Sir”

Bucky quietly exited the room after a quick slap to Steve’s ass. He took his time to reach the kitchen - after all, part of the experience was to build anticipation. He took a cup from the cupboard and filled it with ice cubes.

Ice. He never would have thought he or Steve would ever enjoy that but it turns out temperature play is a pretty good therapy - if you’re willing to have some failed attempts.

Just as he was making his way back, an idea crossed his mind. Smirking, he deviated to the bathroom and bent down to the cabinet under the sink. Opening it, he searched their little care case and sought for the tiny metallic jar until he found it.                                                                                                                                                  

Only then did Bucky return to their room. He entered quietly, but given Steve’s state, he probably could have stomped through the door banging pots and pans and Steve wouldn’t notice. Steve was panting, head thrown back and pelvis jerking along the vibration in his ass, hands clenching tightly and tugging at their restraints, face red and body covered in a light veil of perspiration. His dick was heavy against his belly, a shade of red so deep it looked painful, especially contrasting against the tight black ring at its base. Sounds of pleasure and luscious ache were flowing steadily from his delicious lips.

Steve looked utterly debauched. Utterly fuckable. And utterly Bucky’s.

Keeping sound at a minimum, Bucky tiptoed in total silence to their bed. Just as quietly, he opened the little jar and dipped his fingertip to take a bit of the wax like cream. His eyes flicked to Steve face, close to his own. He noted traces of wetness on the flushed cheeks, the way his dishevelled damped hair looked like a messy golden halo, and how red and alluring his lips were, from being bitten.

He must have stared a bit too long, because suddenly, Steve asked, “Bucky…?”

Snapping back to present - and kicking himself for having ruin his effect - Bucky applied the bit of cream all over Steve’s left areola.

For five good seconds, nothing happened. Then Steve started to kick, chest arching as to escape too overwhelming sensations.

            “Oh fuck…!”

That made Bucky chuckle as he positioned himself back on the bed, straddling his lover. He took a little bit more of Tiger Balm and repeated the action on the right areola.

            “Language, doll.”

            “Oh God, oh God, f-f-fuc-”

            “Too hot?” Bucky chirped cheerfully, “Here, let me help you.”

He bowed and blew on the wet area. The areola looked bright red, shining a bit with the balm it had been lathered in. From so close, the sniper could discern the smell of camphor and menthol. Steve’s pecs shook with a spasm, whining lowly.

With the tip of his pointer, Bucky rubbed the excess of product, carefully avoiding the nub in the centre. Steve wailed and tugged at the handcuffs, trying to twist away from the burning touch.

            “Stay still, Stevie. How is this supposed to be effective if your body doesn’t absorb all of it? Hm?” His fingernail outlined the hot ring of flesh with a deep pressure.

His own hard-on screamed for attention. Taking advantage of where he was sitting, Bucky started a languid roll of hips against the blond’s toned abs. He groaned in pleasure.

Steve kept writhing “ Sir, oh fuck, please, please-“

“Please what, my sweet?”

The blond desperately howled “I-I don’t know !”

Bucky cooed. He had his lover almost where he wanted him to be.

            “Don’t worry, love. I know exactly what you need. Here, let me help you cool off a bit.”

Quick as snake, he grabbed an ice cube from the bowl left on the floor and held it directly on the nub of Steve’s nipple.

            “Ahh!”

Steve’s surprised cry made Bucky roll his hips harder against him. The sniper could only imagine how confusing the sensation could be for his lover’s body, scorching hot followed freezing cold. And on such a sensitive zone.

Bucky applied the ice cube to the other nub before trailing it in abstract patterns all over Steve’s chest. The cold raised goose-bumps on its path and the former assassin wanted to follow the watery traces left behind with his tongue. But he didn’t. Not yet.

Instead, he moved the ice cube between the blond’s luscious pecs, above his collarbone and into the little dip at the centre, in the midst of his neck and outlining his Adam’s apple, deriving abruptly on the left to follow Steve’s jawline up to his perfectly smooth cheek, aiming for his parted lips. The ice cube had drastically melted, but that didn’t stop Bucky prompting him.

            “Babydoll, give it a kiss.”

Through hooded eyes, Bucky looked Steve feverishly doing so, pressing his mouth on the freezing surface. Grabbing at his lover’s nape with his free hand, Bucky pulled him in a filthy kiss, pushing the remain of the cube inside the Captain mouth and twirling it between their tongues. After he had thoroughly kissed his boyfriend, Bucky pulled back and popped another frozen little cube directly in his mouth. This one would melt even faster, so he had to be quick.

Bucky shuffled to his lover’s lower region and took him in his mouth, hard hot flesh alongside icy coldness. Steve let out another loud curse at that, but Bucky didn’t stop his sweet torture and sucked him until the ice had totally melted, then some more. Eventually, he let Steve drop off his now chilly palate.

            “Sir… You’re killing me…”

            “It’s okay, babe. You’re being so brave for me, my gorgeous, perfect boy…”

Steve moaned at the praise and Bucky physically had to kiss him.

He couldn’t wait anymore. He needed to be inside his lover.

Slowly, he pulled the vibrator and turned it off before tossing it away. The blond canted his hips and twisted at the loss. Bucky soothed him by stroking at his thighs with his silver palm; with the other, he generously lubricated his cock.

            “You want something, doll?”

            “You ! I want you, Sir !”

            The Dom let out a low chuckle, “well you got me, sweet thing. I’m right here.” At his partners frustrated sigh, Bucky felt like an asshole. But it wasn’t enough to stop him from teasing his lover a bit more.

            “Tell me, what do you want from me?”

            “I want you to fuck me” Steve growled.

            “Really? I’m not very convinced…”

            The Captain threw his head back and thrusted so hard in the air that Bucky jolted a little. “I want you to pound me, Sir, please, fuck me like you own me because you do, I’m totally yours, only yours, and I want to feel you for days, I want you to fuck me so good you’ll make me come even with the ring on. Please, please Sir, I want it so bad, I want _you_ so bad, fuck me !”

            Steve’s little speech had made waves of arousal rush to the sniper’s dick and he was positively straining. He grabbed the blond under one of his thick thighs and lifted it to expose more of his lover’s rounded ass. Taking his cock with his free hand, he guided it to the Captain’s opening. At the first kiss of Bucky’s dick against Steve’s hole, the bound man made a move to try impale himself.

            Bucky chuckled fondly, “Slut”, he cooed.

            “Totally am,” Steve shot back, “I mean, have you seen yourself? How am I supposed to keep my hands away from you?”

            “If you’re still this coherent, I’m not doing my job good enough.” With that, Bucky slid all the way home in one smooth push.

Steve’s breathy laugh cut into a moan and Bucky stilled for a minute. Steve was always so tight and so damn hot, no matter how much prep was involved; if he started moving now, Bucky would have blown his load like a teenager.

Eventually, he started building a rhythm. Long, deep thrusts aiming to brush the blond’s sweet spot. Steve was quivering around him, little hole clenching and unclenching like it wanted to milk him. Steve was absolutely doing it on purpose and Bucky knew that. His movements grew quicker, with a desperate edge to it, unyielding and dominant.

            “Oh f-fuck ! Sir ! AH !”

Bucky smirked smugly at his boyfriends crumbling face. The blond’s jaw grew slack, his throat, exposed, and his entire body loosened to welcome the pounding he was taking with a sensual surrender. The sniper knew that behind the blindfold, Steve’s brows were scrunched and his eyes fluttered closed or wet with unshed tears.

They didn’t need the blindfold anymore and Bucky wanted to see his beautiful babe’s baby blues. So he untied it with his free hand and took hold of Steve’s gracious, offered face. Heavy lidded eyes, flushed cheeks and lips parted in the sweetest “o”, pleasure made Steve look like an angel.

            “Stevie- you’re so-so goddamned beautiful-fuck”

Bucky ravished Steve’s mouth with hunger as the blond was losing himself more and more in the overwhelming sensations, until the bound man couldn’t even kiss his lover back. Bucky didn’t mind, though, and was content to dip his tongue in and out of Steve open mouth in languid exploration.

If Steve was so far in subspace, Bucky knew the Captain might not be able to form coherent sentence anymore, and from what he saw, the blond was more than ready to come.

            “You’ve been such a good boy,” he breathed in Steve’s ear, kissing the lobe. “You waited three times for me, my perfect boy, I’m so proud of you, I love you so much. I’m gonna take the ring of and you can come any time you want, okay?”

Steve’s unintelligible noises became keen at the mention of coming, so Bucky took his lover’s length into his hand and freed it from its constricting device. He jerked Steve off two, three, four times and then Steve was coming with thick white rope and strangled cries. His release made him tighten around Bucky and soon, the sniper was overwhelmed as well; he climaxed deep inside Steve fluttering walls.

They were both breathless and Bucky’s limbs felt like jelly, but Steve must have been in the same state. The soldier rolled over to not crush his lover - and winced when his side landed on the forgotten unused nipple clamps - and released the blond’s wrists. After that, he grabbed the first bit of fabric his hand landed on and used it to wipe the come off of them.

            “You did so good, Stevie, you were so amazing. I love you so much, my beautiful, wonderful boy…”

Bucky pulled his shivering boyfriend on top of him and wrapped him in his arms, before dragging the blanket on their bodies. He kept whispering sweet nothings and words of praise, and rubbed at Steve’s wrists to help blood circulation flow back. Bucky couldn’t see any marks though, which was a good thing. 

Bucky knew Steve had come back to his senses when he felt a light kiss on his scruffy cheek.

            “Hey there, babydoll. How are you feeling?”

            “Good…” Steve murmured, nuzzling a bit more against Bucky’s skin, “Really good… ‘s was so good…”

            The sniper chuckled, “’M glad you enjoyed it, babe. Here,” he blindly reached for the bottle of water he knew was nearby his side of the bed “Drink.”

Steve gratefully took the bottle and emptied it in three long gulps.

            “You sore anywhere ? Are you hungry? Want some more water?”

            “No,” Steve said, shuffling a bit closer and closing his eyes. “Haven’t feel this relaxed in… long time…”

Bucky gently combed Steve’s blond locks and pressed his lips to his lover’s temple. Then he took a deep breath and went for it.

“Steve… There’s something I’ve meant to tell you tonight. Something very important to me - to us - and I’ve wanted to say it for such a long time… I wanted to ask you this at the perfect moment, and what’s more perfect than you and me making love?” He breathed a nervous chuckle. “You’re the love of my life, the reason why I open my eyes every morning and why I can close them peacefully every night. You’re my best friend, my partner, my true north, my soul mate. You’ve always been there for me and I want to always stay at your side. So, Steve Rogers-”

A breathy snore interrupted his speech.

Bucky blinked.

Steve was out as a light over him.

The sniper wanted to crush his own skull against the headboard. He also wanted to curse so loud the entire Tower would heard him, but not waking Steve up was more important so he had to settle for some angry mental yelling.

Fuck.

The worst thing was, Bucky should have seen it coming. Steve rarely made it more than thirty seconds after they played like this. Bucky himself was quite exhausted, but- fuck. Just, fuck.

So even if he just had amazing sex with the love of his life currently sleeping in his arms, Bucky passed out with a feeling grumpy and put out.

_Universe: 1; Bucky; 0._

__

 

****

Four days after the Grand Fail #4 - which, by the way, Bucky had never thought he’d associate sex, and sex as intense at that was, with the notion of failure - Bucky’s nerves were at breaking point. He truly was out of options. Or, more accurately, he wasn’t even capable of finding the best way to ask the love of his life to spend the rest of their lifetime together. Not succeeding at something he wanted to achieve already pissed him off ordinarily, but with something as important as this? Urgh.

Icing on the cake, even his everyday life had recently become nerve-racking. Tony’s jokes were less and less endurable, Wanda had made a mistake on their last mission that could have killed citizens, Butterfingers had accidentally broke Destiel’s tree and the cat refused to use the new one, leading to the pet sharpening his claws on the furniture instead…

It was nothing serious and Bucky knew that but dammit, he was tense as a drum skin and he tended to snap easier. He did try to avoid yelling at anyone: he knew it was nobody’s fault that life was ruining his attempts at proposal. So, when Clint confessed this morning that he had accidentally erased all of Bucky’s recorded movies on the TV of the shared living room, Bucky had taken a deep breath, restrained himself from throwing something at his friend’s face, took his hoodie and went for a very long run. He might be sweaty now and his legs might feel like burning, but a least he no longer wanted to unload a clip between Clint’s eyes.

He was calm until he saw Natasha leaning against the elevator door, casually inquiring, “So, how’s the big project going?”

He pointedly ignored her even when she slipped in behind him right before the door closed with a DING. Feeling the woman’s stare burning his face, he figured he should just get this over and done with otherwise Nat had the stubbornness of an ox. “What?”

“So?”

“Well as you can see from Steve’s lack of ring, it’s clearly not going well,” he spat, keeping his tone low.

“Sorry, it was difficult to pay attention to something so small when that storm cloud above your head is so obvious it can been seen from Asgard,” she hissed in the same tone

Bucky’s nostrils flared and his fists clenched, but he didn’t say anything.

“Anyway,” the redhead kept going, “You need to either reign it in or propose very quickly, because Steve is starting to suspect something.”

All of Bucky’s blood drained, sucked into a vortex of fear. “What?!”

“For now he’s not thinking about you proposing, but he thinks you’re acting weird.”

“Nat, I’m a centenarian supersoldier with a metal arm and brain damage who was also frozen  and thawed multiple times, of course I’m weird !” he whispered-yelled.

“Well he’s worried about you and I have to say, you’re not exactly being subtle.”

“Thanks, Nat, for your help as always. Don’t follow me.”

The elevator dinged, indicating they had reached Bucky’s floor. Taking a deep breath, he went to his and Steve’s door. Then he stilled for two solid minutes, hesitating. Fuck. What was he supposed to do? Was a botched wedding proposal better than a busted wedding proposal? In all honesty, the thought of a shoddy proposal made him want to scream, after all the admittedly bad but still full of well meaning attempts he had made. He had to come to terms with it. He wasn’t capable of offering Steve the wonderful marriage proposal he deserved. He gritted his teeth and felt his nose sting. Fuck!

The door opened right to his blotched face. Steve looked half angry, half anxious, and a whole lot of concerned. “I asked FRIDAY to tell me when you’d be back. She said you were on the doorstep for five minutes. I was starting to worry,” the Captain said in an even tone, stepping aside, “come in.”

Bucky fought to get a smile on his face, but knew Steve wouldn’t be fooled by it. “Thanks, babydoll.”

As soon as the door closed behind them, Steve crossed his arms, eyebrows frowned. Oh.

“So?”

“So what, Steve?”

“So, are you gonna tell me what’s been bothering you the last few days like a grown up or do I have to get it outta you?”

“You shouldn’t frown so much or you’ll look your real age-”

“I’m not joking, Buck.”

The sniper sighed. Dammit. “It’s nothing, I swear-”

“I’m not buying your bullshit anymore!” Steve yelled, making him flinch, “ Goddammit, why don’t you want to let me help?!”

“It’s not like that !” Bucky immediately denied.

“Then why don’t you want to tell me why you’re so upset lately?”

“I’m not-”

“For Christ sake, you were almost crying on our fucking doorstep !”

At that, Bucky’s chin dipped down and his shoulders slumped. His mouth curved downwards and he felt horribly ashamed.

Steve visibly took his discomfort for something else “See?”

“Stevie…”

“Please.”

The way his lover’s voice broke on the last syllable clenched Bucky’s heart so hard it hurt.

“Please, I can’t stand seeing you unhappy and not able to help.”

Bucky was about to break down. He hated, hated seeing Steve in distress like that. Even more when cause of said distress was his own stupid self. So screw his efforts if it made Steve sad like it just did. He’d tell him the truth right here and right now, and he’d do it without the perfection he’d aimed for.

At the same time it sounded so unfair. He was the one who had screwed up, and Steve was the one suffering the consequences. Hell, now he couldn’t even make a decent marriage proposal ! He’d have to do with this total fiasco and proof of his inability to do anything right.

Just as he was about to open his mouth, Steve had apparently taken his silence for stubbornness. “Fucking hell- why do you let your fucking pride or something stop people from helping you-”

Bucky almost choked on his own spit. “Excuse me?! _I_ am too prideful to let people help me?! Don’t you think you’re in any position to lecture me about that, Steve.”

Steve threw his arms in the air, “Yes, because I’m not the one hiding that I’m hurt! And it’s not the first time you've done it, back in the war you didn’t tell me you thought you’d been poisoned, or that you was falling in love with me ‘cause you-”    

The sniper’s voice cut him off, cold and angry, “Fucking seriously, Rogers ?! Unlike you, I never hid anything from you except when I thought it’d hurt you !”

Steve’s face fell first in disbelief then in anger. “The hell is that supposed to mean ?! I never hid anything, and I do mean anything, from you !”

“Oh yeah? ‘Cause I don’t exactly remember you telling me you were also falling for me before we had sex, nor do I remember you telling me about all this Project Rebirth shit, or is this HYDRA’s brainwashing that took it away?”

That was a low blow and he knew it, but fuck, Steve had really pissed him of.

The Avengers leader crossed the short distance between them so fast and for a second, Bucky thought Steve would punch him. Instead, despite his tight-shut lips and clenched fist, the blond slowly raised his pointer toward him and articulated “Don’t. You. Fucking. Dare.”

But Bucky was just as mad as his boyfriend, and rather than stopping the blossoming argument, he threw oil on the fire. “What? Bringing up the fact that you didn’t even think about what would happen if Erskine’s project went wrong? Of how you’d leave me alone and mourning for your stupid martyr ass?”

Bucky found himself violently shoved against the wall, his lover’s hands tightly gripping his shirt collar. Only then did he saw the glint of anger and pain in Steve’s usually sky-blue eyes.

The idea of proposing now zinged through the sniper’s head. Steve had always been passionate spitfire, so a passionate proposing would fit. Plus it’d reassure the punk and might even end in rough sex. But as soon as the thought happened, he brushed it off.

No.

It would sound like Bucky trying to make his partner feel guilty, or Steve thinking of it as a simple excuse to close the argument without Bucky passing for the bad guy.

He closed his mouth.

Visibly still greatly annoyed, Steve stormed off to their bedroom.

Fuck.

Fuck !

Bucky wanted to slap himself. What a fucking stupid unfair idiot he was !

He quickly went after his lover.  Once he reached the door, he hesitated then knocked.

“Steve?”

He didn’t get any answer. The door wasn’t locked so he opened it and passed his head to have a look. Steve was sat on their bed, back to the door. Bucky sighed and eventually came in “Steve… I’m sorry.”

His lover didn’t move, but Bucky saw the blond’s shoulders slump a bit. Bucky crawled on the bed to reach his partner, then carefully hugged him from behind. He didn’t dare to look at him so fixed his eyes to the ground instead. Destiel was rubbing at Steve’s leg, probably feeling his owner’s distress.

 “Stevie, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. It was unfair and stupid. You know I’m so grateful for a lot of things the serum gave you - better health, a physique that made people finally listen to you like they should have from the beginning, hell, it even saved me twice. I had no right to accuse you of not telling me about Project Rebirth. It was your choice, your decision to make and I wouldn’t have anything to say. I would have respected and encouraged whatever decision you would’ve made. I wasn’t trying to… to make you feel guilty. I’ve been a total jerk. I’m sorry.”

Fingertips lightly pressed on his flesh hand, “no,” Steve said, “ I should apologise. Well, you have been a jerk,” he added in a teasing tone, “but I shouldn’t try to… force you. You don’t have to tell me everything, you don’t owe me anything, I’m not- I’m not like these bastards who used you and wanted a report-

“ I’d never think that-”

“I know but…” Steve sighed and closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose and slightly rubbing the skin there. “ I hate seeing you feeling bad. You had to endure so much on your own, and there were times where I should have been there to help you, to take the pain away, but I wasn’t-”

At that, Bucky felt a horrid pressure blossoming on his solar plexus, “No, no, hey Stevie, babydoll, you couldn’t know-“

“But I should have !” The other man exclaimed in frustration, “ I know you don’t resent me for that but I do. And I promised myself I’d never let you feel alone or in pain again-“

“I don’t,” Bucky swore, clasping Steve’s hand in his. He released Steve from the hug but only to turn his partner toward him.

“Look at me. You are the reason why I’m still alive and why I still want to live. ‘f course, I can’t say it’s always pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows-”

“Good, ‘cause I wouldn’t believe you.”

“Not with all the nightmare and post-trauma shit. But even then, Steve, or should I say especially then, you’re the one holding my head above the water. You’re the one taking the pain away and replacing it with light and hope.”

“And love.” Steve whispered, barely a silver of air between them, before kissing Bucky.

“And love.” the long-haired man agreed against his lover’s lips.

His metal hand stroked softly at the clean-shaven skin of Steve’ jaw, and both men sighed in the kiss.

When they parted, they rested forehead to forehead, a smile tugging each of their lips.

“I’m sorry for what I said,” Bucky repeated.

Steve rubbed their noses together, eyes crinkled, “So am I. I never want to hurt you.”

“Me neither. ‘til the end of the line.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

 

 

****

“I will never, _ever_ , understand why you love that shit so much.”

Steve and Bucky were sprawled on the couch, tightly tucked against each other. Steve licked his thumb, where a bit of rice from the take-away sushi they had for dinner had stuck.

 “You’re just playing Grumpy-Bucky all over again. Besides,” he shifted a bit to nuzzle and peck at the other man’s jaw, “I know you don’t hate Disney movies.”

The last two weeks had been busy for both Avengers, and they hadn’t had a lot of time to themselves, even less to spend with each other. Barely a second to kiss before promptly passing out in their bed, sometimes without even eating before. So now that they had a decent night to themselves, they had implicitly agreed to a lazy evening: take out and snogging and cuddling and whatever movie they first laid hands on. Which this time happened to be _Sleeping Beauty_.

“I totally do,” Bucky insisted, “ I mean, come on !” The arm that wasn’t coiled around the blond’s shoulders threw itself in the direction of their TV screen. “That’s dumb cheesy. And it’s always the same stuff ! Pretty princess facing evil bad things but overpowering it without raising her little finger by the magical power of love. Talk about women’s representation. ”

“ You’re being unfair. Their post 90s movies have better scenarios and stop with the damsel in distress thing.” A few meters away, Destiel was scratching at his cat-tree, providing irregular _scrrrv scrrrv_ background noises.

“Maybe, but then they started doing all in digital art.”

“Hu-huh. Say the man who spent ten whole minute explaining  to Wanda why ‘How To Train your Dragon’ is, quote ‘way damn better than Titanic’, end quote?”

 “ C’mon Rogers, that’s a Dreamworks film and that’s not what I meant ! Seriously, you’re supposed to be the artist and that doesn’t bother you, how they copy-paste all their female characters ?”

Steve just shook his head, fond grin still on his face. Bucky picked another maki directly from the box on their coffee table, threw it in his mouth and then started to list things off, unfolding a finger each time.

 “Throw in a bucket some enormous alien-like eyes, button nose, little mouth, thin and lightly curvy bodies, shake and voilà ! You got your Disney princess.”

“You just wanna contradict me, jerk. Digital animated art allows new techniques that broadened the horizons of illustrator’s possibilities.” The Captain reminded, flicking at his boyfriend’s nose.

“Now who’s the one wanting to contradict the other? You hate digital art, punk.”

“I don’t hate it, I prefer the old fashion way. And it doesn’t mean I can’t see its value.” Bucky just went on like he hadn’t heard, “And the characters are always so dramatic like ‘ _Oh no! Bad news! I’ll run to my bed to delicately cry myself to death on the mattress!_ ‘ And the songs- if I hear Let It Go one more time, I’ll freeze myself again.”

Steve rolled his eyes, not able to stop his easy smile.

“Well you should love Disney then, you’re just as dramatic as its princesses.”

Bucky squawked an undignified “Hey!” and launched himself at his lover to tickle him, aiming for the ribs. Steve yelped and started wriggling like an epileptic eel, struggling and kicking while yelling at Bucky between laughs. Bucky grinned, merciless, and kept his assault until a twist of the blond’s hip had Steve’s foot kicking at the coffee table, strong enough to topple one half full box of sashimi and a cup of soy sauce on the floor. Destiel startled, ears down, before the grey and black ball of fur trotted to lap at the mess.

            “Well done, Rogers,” Bucky said, finally retreating. Steve’s face was flushed, hair dishevelled and chest heaving still, not unlike after a round in their bedroom. A pang of arousal rushed to the sniper’s dick like some perverse Pavlovian reflex. Chasing the thought away, he got up to the kitchen to grab some paper towel.

            “You kidding me?” Steve replied with a bit of shortness in breath, straightening  up, “that’s totally your fault, Barnes. No, no, no, young man” he tutted, pushing the cat away with one hand and picking the fallen food to put it back on the table. “You know I go all… How do you say? All berserk when you tickle me.”

As Bucky mopped the spilled sauce, he felt a tender kiss on the nape of his neck. The sweet gesture made tendrils of warmth blossom in his abdomen and a happy smile tugged at his mouth. As he sat back on the couch, he gently touched Steve’s cheek. There’s a grain of rice stuck at the corner of the blond’s mouth, and Bucky softly swept it with his flesh thumb, eyes crinkled, “C’mere, babydoll.”

The kiss was soft and languid, a mellow tease of tongues. The cat mewled and Steve had food on his face and it was warm and tender and lazy- it was home. They parted, foreheads lightly touching.

 

It hit Bucky.

 

There is no perfect moment to propose to Steve. At least not in the conventional way.

Because as long as they’re together, him and the wonderful love of his life, every moment is perfect. Just Steve, Bucky, their love and the promise of spending their lifetime together.

Bucky had been so caught up with this whole story, had so much wanted to be perfect for Steve, that he had freaked out at every occasion he had had. They could have been fiancés weeks ago, if only Bucky hadn’t had been stuck in his stress.

There was a glint in the summer pool that were Steve’s eyes, which both made words spill out of his mouth and tighten his throat with emotion. He was going to propose for good.

“Stevie-”

“Buck,” Steve said at the same time. Bucky’s voice didn’t came out, coiled with all the sentiments that had bottled up, and Steve used the opportunity to continue.

“ You know I can’t live without you. I’ve never seen a future without you close by my side,” The Captain kept on with in a soft tone. “I love you, and I hope you know how much I do. I… I want to wake up to your face every morning and go to bed every night in your arms. I even want to fall asleep with your little snores…”

“Hey, I don’t-”

“Whether we’re at home or in the battlefield, whether we’re arguing or holding hands, whether we’re teasing or in a complete silence, I love you and I know we got the other’s back.” Long artist fingers gently cradled the sniper’s face. “I never thought that we could have this, Buck, never dreamed of actually be able to legally go hand in hand with you. And I think if we both survived all the hurt and sorrow and decades we did, maybe it was so we could find ourselves here, in a time where two men can officially be married.”

The realisation clicked right there in Bucky’s head.

 “So, James Buchanan Barnes, will you marr-“

“OH HELL NO!”

Hurt flashed on Steve’s face and the blond immediately flinched like he’d been slapped, lowering his hands away. Bucky didn’t even have time to worry about Steve misunderstanding him; the sniper kept on with the same indignant tone, “I worked my arse too damn hard on it to have you beating me at it, so you take that right back you punk!”

            Steve looked at him, puzzled. “What do you…”

Bucky asserted very seriously, flaming, “I wanted to ask you for weeks, I searched every way, every place to do it, thought about every word I’d tell you and spent hours before picking you a ring. But every time I tried to do it, something held me back. Something that told me it wasn’t good enough, that you deserved the best proposing ever because you’re the best thing that happened to me and I wanted to at least give you that. And now that I finally realise that I just need us together to make it perfect, you start your beautiful speech and you look at me with your beautiful face and you’re about to overtake me!”

Steve blinked at him, realisation slowly growing on his features. Bucky went on, still  somewhat undignified, “I won’t have it so don’t you dare finish your sentence, you shut your trap, you sit your ass on this damn couch and you listen to me.” He dropped to the floor and looked straight at Steve.

“I love you and I think I have since I’ve known you, I just was too much of a dumbass to accept it. And we’ve been through so many hardships and pain and loss and fear that I am certain you are the one for me, you always have been. Whatever people or challenges or even deities, or even the whole fucking universe, tried to keep us apart, we’ll always find our way  back to each other.” His voice was vibrant with passion and firm with intent. “So,” he tightly took Steve’s hands in his and stared straight to the blond’s blue eyes. “Steven Grant Rogers, love of my life, will you marry me?”

At the end of that, Bucky was a bit out of breath. His palms still clasping Steve’s, he slowly realised that:

  1. He kinda had just made a scene,
  2. He might have sounded a bit aggressive which totally wasn’t the vibe he was going for,



and 3. Of all the way he could have propose, this one was certainly amongst the worse.

Steve’s silence wasn’t helping.

Until said man pounced on him. Bucky’s back thudded against the coffee table as he found himself with a lapful of Captain America. Steve planted his mouth on his, kissing him thoroughly before parting with a laugh, “ You absolute dork !”

“Don’t insult a man that just proposed to you, that’s not very polite. Annnnd I kinda realised I might just have overreacted about you popping the question first,” the soldier said, rubbing sheepishly at the back of his neck. “ I’ll take that as a yes, though ?”

“You absolute, absolute dork,” Steve repeated, eyes crinkled and smile so bright it made Bucky’s core tighten. “Of course I’ll marry you ! Wait, is this why you were acting so strange lately ? The thing you were hiding from me and that we argued about?”

“Err, yes. And, uh. There might have been one or two failed attempts before, too.”

Steve bemused grin erased all of Bucky’s embarrassment “Really ? Like what ?”

             “ Don’t you dare laugh at my struggle to woo you, Rogers.” Bucky pressed a kiss on the blond’s smooth cheek. “Like during the press release I deigned to go to. I might have done it only ‘cause I planned to propose to you live.” Another kiss on the blond’s eyelid. “Or during the shortened date at Fin’Amor.” Another on his chin. “Or that time we had a BDSM scene and you felt dead asleep after.” One last peck on the mouth.

            “Oh my God.” Steve chuckled “ My poor, poor unlucky love. And to think I almost overtook you.”

            “You always had to be a competitive punk.”

            “Have to say, I really thought you didn’t want to. I mean, When I started and you interrupted me like I had insulted you…”

            “Well technically you had. Not that marrying you would be insulting, far from it. But beating me about it, that was insulting my valiant efforts beforehand.”

They were interrupted by Destiel jumping on Steve’s lap to paw desperately at Steve’s chest. Steve scratched the tabby between his ears, “You curious about the fuss, hey? You heard that, buddy? Your daddies are gonna get married !” It only earned him a faint meow.

            “And YOU call me the dork?” Bucky snorted in amusement.

Steve looked back at him, grinning with his lower lip lightly tucked between his teeth.

            “Did you really get me a ring?”

Bucky rose up with Steve’s hand in his to pull his lover up along with him. Without breaking eye contact and smirking, the sniper led him to their bedroom. Then he pulled the drawer of his nightstand and opened its false bottom. Bucky delicately plucked the velvety black box and opened it, presenting the ring to his now fiancé. He felt his guts tightening, but he saw Steve’s throat swallow so he wasn’t the only one affected.

            “I hope it’s a silent awe,” Bucky joked.

Steve’s eyes blinked and Bucky saw wetness in their blueness. “You absolute jerk,” Steve choked, “It’s beautiful. I love it.”

“The ring or said jerk?”

“Shut up” Steve laughed and pulled him in a kiss that left stars behind Bucky’s eyelids.

“So?” Bucky asked expectantly with a teasing grin, still holding the ring and taking Steve’s left hand, “you gonna let me put it on you, babydoll ?”

“You know that’s the wrong hand, right?” Steve said, taunting and teasing written all over his features, “Left is for when we’ll marry, it’s right ring finger for the engagement.”                                                                                                   

“I’m sure you’re only saying that so I can spoil you with another ring,” Bucky tssked softly.

“Busted.”

Steve’s gentle chuckle stopped when, slowly, Bucky slid the ring on his finger. Bucky’s lips were dry and something was tugging at his stomach, but not in a bad way. No, it was the kind of excitement he felt when, younger, he was nearing Coney Island for a day of fun; the same tug that took him when he finally had Steve back after days apart. Like Steve was his centre of gravity, always calling him back, always having Bucky itching to close any distance between them.

There was a hand at his nape, pulling him in another sweet, passionate kiss.

“I love you, James Buchanan Barnes,” Steve whispered like it was something precious.

Bucky’s thumb gently swept the trail of wetness running on his lover’s cheek.

“And I love you too, Steven Grant Rogers.”

****

“Wait, you WHAT?!”

Tony’s shriek was so indignant it was amusing.                                                                             

“As your genius eyes can see,” Bucky held Steve’s right hand in the air, “I proposed and he said yes.”

“But you did it so lamely! Seriously Buckaroo, I didn’t give you all of my great advice so you’d throw it in the wind and didn’t even prepare the last bit-“

“Oh believe me,” Steve promptly interrupted, “he prepared. And you know what?” the blond said as he looked at his fiancé, beaming, “It was perfect.”

Wanda squealed in delight and hugged Steve while Sam clapped Bucky on the shoulder. “Well done, man.”

But Tony, which apparently had decided to stay an ultimate asshole, rolled his eyes. “Yeah yeah, ‘f course you find it perfect, because you’re a sappy asshole. But you have to say-”

“That you’re being awful right now, Tony,” Natasha chirped in smoothly, just arriving. As she fixed her usual morning coffee, she rose an elegant eyebrow at the Stark heir, “and, if I might add, they are now officially engaged. That isn’t the case for every couple here.” With a mischievous pat on Tony’s arm (Bucky delighted in the man’s horrified grimace) “Which, by the way, remind me something…” She held her hand out expectantly, until Tony pulled his wallet out with a groan.

Bucky’s mouth fell in disbelief.

“Are you fucking kidding me? You guys bet on Steve and I’s wedding?!” he flamed.

“Not your wedding,” the red-headed corrected dismissively, “your proposal. I said to Tony that you’d pop the question before he did to Pepper.”

“You sneaky Russian spider,” Bucky groaned while looking flatly at his friend, “so much for your tear streaked speech on true love and whatnot.”

“I only gave you a little nudge, don’t be overdramatic. We only have Tony for that.” ( _Hey !_ came said man’s indignant response, which Natasha royally ignored) “And it’s not like I was the one who planted the idea in your head, you were already thinking about it when you talked to me.”

Sam defensively held both palms out, “I swear to you, I didn’t know about their little bet. And I didn’t know you’d take my joke so seriously!”

Bucky huffed, jaded. Steve chuckled and pressed a kiss to his jawline.

“Don’t go all Grumpy-Bucky in such a moment, love.”

“Mh. Not my fault we have shitty friends.”

“Well excuse me,” came Clint’s voice from the doorway, stuffing his mouth with pancakes, “but we’re the actual best buddies you two old-timers could ever ask for!”

“Keep telling yourself that, Clint. Steve, do we really have to invite them to the wedding?”

“I’m afraid so, Buck. I kinda like them. Plus, I know you’ve grown to appreciate them, too.”

“Hmpf. But they’re so noisyyyy…”

“Watch what you say, Barnes,” Natasha called from where she was counting the money Tony had handed her, “more than one of us will be doing speeches at the reception.”

“Didn’t say everybody was noisy here,” the sniper shrugged, “but you have to admit Tony is particularly loud.”

“Hey!” Tony clasped a hand on his own chest, eyes wide. “After I helped you with my advice and all? I’m wounded. That’s rude!”

“You just said my proposal was lame, Stark. Who’s rude?”

Steve put an end on their childish quarrel. “Sorry Buck, but I kinda want to invite him too. You’ll have to tolerate him and his loudness.”

Of course Bucky wanted Tony to be there for the wedding. Hell, he was thinking of asking him to be his best man. But because Tony was a little shit and Bucky could be an even bigger one, he complained in a whiny voice, “Do we really?”

“Yup.”

“Hm… Okay, but only if we can relegate him to the children’s table. Far, far away in the room. He’ll even fit right into those little chairs just fine.” He took Steve’s face in his hands, grinning widely “That’s a deal, Mister Barnes-Rogers?”

Steve laughed and kissed him, then smiled on his mouth “That’s a deal, Mister Barnes-Rogers.”

_Game, set and match to Bucky._

 


End file.
